And before I knew it, I was standing in a white room.
"Hey."
"Yo."
The bastard made of mosaics was doing as well as ever.
Of course, he wasn't sealed away or down in the dumps or anything.
Just the same old Human God.
"So that thing I saw forty years ago — that was the power of foresight?"
"Yep."
The Human God was exactly as I remembered.
That said, it had been forty, maybe fifty years since the last time I'd seen him. The Human God's "as usual" was already a distant memory.
Still, I did recall that when we first met, he'd had that same brazen attitude.
"I thought that if you saw that, you might ease up a little."
"Well, that didn't work out."
"No big deal. It was a long shot anyway."
I wasn't so weak-willed that I'd abandon everything I'd done up to now just because of a single dream.
Though, if it hadn't come in the form of a dream, I might not have ruled out the possibility of doing just that.
"By the way, is that really what you looked like?"
At his words, I glanced down at myself.
At some point, my appearance had changed.
Not the blob of fat I'd come to expect.
My body had transformed into the one I'd grown accustomed to in this world.
The body of
I couldn't see my face, so I wasn't sure, but I didn't feel particularly old.
"You didn't know?"
"No. My eyes see souls directly, so I could tell there was a difference between your body and your soul. But this is the first time I've actually seen it."
Yet another new fact I was learning just now.
But then again, when I thought about it, I didn't know what the Human God looked like either.
Fair's fair.
But why had my body changed back now, of all times?
...No explanation needed, really.
"Well, either way, this is the end for you."
"...Yeah."
I had died.
Age seventy-four.
I remembered the last moment, hazily but clearly enough.
Surrounded by children and grandchildren — I think it was a happy ending.
At least, compared to my previous death, it was the difference between heaven and earth.
Compared to dying alone, powerless, pathetic, wanting to cry...
"With you gone, I'll finally have an easier time moving around."
"I see."
"While you were alive, anything I did was pointless."
"So you finally gave up."
"Hardly."
The Human God's aura shifted.
Anger.
"Of course not. If you knew that kind of future was coming, could you just give up? Spending ten thousand years, a hundred thousand years, alone — unable to do anything, unable to see anything — when you already know you can't endure it? How could you possibly give up?"
Well... yeah.
When you put it on that scale, it was hard to even imagine.
But I understood, at least a little.
What would happen to you if you didn't act now.
What kind of future awaited.
If you knew you'd have regrets, there was no way you could just sit there and do nothing.
"Yeah, I guess you wouldn't just give up..."
"...What's with that smug look? You think you've already won?"
"Do you have some kind of plan?"
"I do. I learned that
"I see."
"You understand what I'm saying, right? I'll take the structure you built and turn it on its head. In a world without you, using the things you prepared, I'll win. You can't do anything anymore — you're dead! You can't stop your own descendants from fighting and killing each other. You can't come crying to me, begging me to stop. You can't even watch!"
The Human God spoke gleefully. I scratched my cheek.
Then scratched the back of my head.
It wasn't really itchy.
I just wasn't sure how to respond.
"I see."
My reaction made the Human God stomp his foot hard.
"What the hell...!"
He stomped and stomped, his voice rising with frustration.
"How can you stay so calm!?"
"Well... I'm dead."
I answered without missing a beat, and the Human God was rendered speechless.
I closed my eyes.
I thought back on everything.
In this world, I had done what I wanted to do.
I got married. I made friends.
I had children. I had plenty of grandchildren.
I worked hard at my job.
Sure, when the Human God talked about the future, I felt uneasy. And there were probably things I could have done more of.
But somehow...
Strangely, I had no regrets.
Or rather — nothing left undone, nothing left unsaid.
I should have been full of worry and anxiety, but it wasn't the kind of thing that made me think, "What should I do about it?" Listening to the Human God's words, I didn't feel some sudden urge to resurrect myself and save my children.
My children and grandchildren would find their own way. They'd figure it out.
I walked slowly toward the Human God.
He was surprisingly small.
Maybe because we'd never gotten close to each other before — I'd never realized just how small he was.
"I'm satisfied."
I'd lived long enough.
I didn't think everything had been perfect. There were probably still things left undone. And when I closed my eyes, it wasn't only good memories that came back.
Failures, successes — both remained.
But I didn't want to do it over.
I had died.
My job was done.
The rest was for the living to handle.
Strange, then, given that the person standing in front of me was threatening those I'd left behind.
But it couldn't be helped.
My heart was inexplicably at peace.
"Hey, Human God."
"..."
"I think I tried to say this once before, too."
"...What is it?"
"I don't think I hated you that much."
I thought the Human God made a face.
Of course, that might just be because I was the one who'd won, at least for now.
Not the Human God's doing.
Still, I was sure that if even one thing had gone differently, I could have ended up hating the Human God with every fiber of my being.
The way the me from the future did.
Like him, I might have become nothing more than a machine built to kill the Human God.
I wouldn't have been able to feel this kind of peace.
It just happened to turn out this way. That was all.
"What are you saying...?"
"I'm not entirely sure myself, but the fact that I can feel this peaceful right now — maybe I have you to thank for that. Without you, this clear enemy of mine, I don't think I would have felt this satisfied."
Yeah. That was right.
If the Human God hadn't existed, I probably would have started slacking off around age twenty.
Married Sylphie. Worked a regular job. Tried my best, in a regular sort of way.
Lived a regular life. Died, more or less content.
That's probably how it would have gone.
That would've been fine too, but I doubt I would have achieved this level of satisfaction. Not without that regret — not without the thought that maybe I'd do it over, go back to those days.
Because I had a clear enemy, a clear goal, I kept moving until the day I died.
And the result was the me standing here now.
"...Even if you say that, I'm not going to ease up."
"No — yeah, that's not what I meant, but..."
I wasn't sure what I was trying to say.
It wasn't like I had something I needed to tell the Human God.
I didn't hate him — but that didn't mean I particularly liked him.
And I certainly wasn't here to say thank you.
"..."
"..."
And just like that, the conversation trailed off.
An awkward silence filled the room.
Then, a stray thought crossed my mind.
"...Why did I end up in this world, anyway?"
I murmured it to myself.
"No idea."
The Human God muttered back, equally quiet.
"You really don't know?"
"If I did, I would have stopped it before it happened. You appeared completely out of nowhere. Even I didn't notice until the day of the Teleportation Incident."
"Huh..."
In the end, I never learned the truth about the Teleportation Incident while I was alive.
"If the person who reincarnated me is out there, tell them I said thanks."
"...No way."
"Thought so."
Blunt refusal.
Well, I supposed the Human God had every grudge in the world to air.
"Anyway, what happens to me now? I'm pretty sure I'm dead."
"Who knows."
The Human God was still glaring at me, irritation etched on his face.
"Normally, a soul returns to mana, merges with other mana, and gets reconstructed into something new. But since you're from another world, there's no telling what'll happen."
"I see."
I'd half hoped I might meet
I knew it was wishful thinking, but still...
Oh well. Our bones would be buried in the same place, at least. I could live with that.
"..."
I looked down. My body was fading, little by little.
So this was what it meant to return to mana.
This was death in this world.
Maybe every other inhabitant of this world passed through this white room in their final moments too.
Though if the Human God didn't bother to show up, you'd probably just fade away in the white room without anything happening.
Come to think of it, the Human God was a lot like a judge of the dead.
That smug grin as your life was dismissed in a single glance...
What a terrible judge.
"Tch..."
But this time, the Human God wasn't grinning.
If anything, he couldn't hide his irritation — he was even fidgeting, bouncing his leg.
He'd wanted to gloat as I disappeared before his eyes, triumphant in his victory. Instead, it had fallen flat. That was why he was so frustrated.
Really was a piece of work.
"..."
I stood before the Human God.
"Well, this might not be my place to say..."
I reached out and placed my hand lightly on his shoulder.
"Good luck from here on out."
I thought he might get angry.
But the Human God let out something like a sigh and let his shoulders drop.
Then, as if his legs gave out, he sank to the ground.
"..."
He didn't say another word.
I looked down at the Human God, then let my gaze sweep around the room.
Pure white, as always.
Nothing.
And my body was nearly gone.
My consciousness was fading, too.
Would I return to my original world?
Or become something else in this one?
Would my memories remain?
Or vanish?
I didn't know. But it didn't matter.
Even if my consciousness and memories survived — even if I were born into a world worse than this one, worse than my previous life — I'd manage.
"See ya."
One last word.
With my awareness dimming by the second, I walked past the Human God and kept going.
Without looking back — just straight ahead.
*—Mushoku Tensei: Isekai Ittara Honki Dasu— — The End—* Recorded by: