Chapter 132 "In Front of the Grave"

Several days had passed since Roxy became my wife.

The lingering anxiety that something terrible might still happen had been gradually fading lately.

Zenith had claimed the other large room in the house — the one that was available.

I told Lillia it might be better not to use it, since it was the room where the previous occupant had died. But Zenith had taken a liking to it and refused to leave.

Lillia saw that and, before I knew it, had talked me into letting it go — telling me there was nothing to worry about.

Well, Zenith would surely prefer a spacious room over a cramped one.

I didn't know much about caregiving or rehabilitation, but a bigger room had to be better than a smaller one.

Of course, I also took Zenith to see a doctor — one of the most renowned physicians in the Ranoa Kingdom, introduced through Ariel.

But he seemed to have no experience with cases like hers and threw up his hands, saying he didn't know any treatment.

As expected, the medical technology of this world wasn't very strong when it came to matters of memory.

Perhaps because Healing Magic existed, this world's medicine seemed to have its blind spots.

That said, I was able to have him put together a rehabilitation program for memory-loss patients.

Whether it would actually help, I had no idea, but doing something had to be better than doing nothing.

…Maybe, if the opportunity arose, it would be worth looking for some kind of magical tool to restore memories.

Whether such a thing even existed, I had no idea.

In the long run, I might just have to keep treating her gradually.

And then there was the question of what Zenith's family in the Holy Milis Kingdom would say.

When it came to Zenith, there was still plenty to worry about.

---

Sylphie's progress was going smoothly.

The other day, she happily let me feel her belly as the baby kicked inside.

In the process, I tried squeezing her breasts — which had swelled due to the pregnancy — and got scolded in all seriousness apparently.

She said it hurt when touched roughly.

I hadn't meant to touch her that hard, but she was startled by the suddenness, apparently.

She asked me to be gentle if I was going to touch.

The way she asked was the kind that made you want to pin her down right there.

Come to think of it, the old me would have fallen for Sylphie's seduction countless times and ended up doing just that.

But she was pregnant now.

I couldn't expose her to my desires.

That said, what I wanted to touch, I still wanted to touch.

So I touched — carefully, gently.

Sure enough, pregnancy brought changes to her body.

These weren't the breasts I was used to feeling on Sylphie.

Thinking that I was the one who had brought about this transformation filled me with an indescribable sense of happiness.

Was this what they called a conquest?

Ah, Sylphie was mine.

But really, losing my left hand was inconvenient.

Those days of kneading her breasts with both hands felt like a lifetime ago.

Having one of two taken away cut the satisfaction in half.

Would she start producing milk soon?

If I said I wanted a little taste, would she get angry?

Would she despise me?

Maybe I should try asking just once, just to see.

It might be better not to, though.

But just once…

"You really love my boobs, don't you, Rudi?"

"Yeah. Sylphie's boobs are small, but they're the best in the world."

"The best in the world…? And yet you've been putting your hands on other girls?"

"S-s-sorry about that."

"Heehee, I'm not mad~"

Sweet as that exchange was, my relationship with Sylphie was in a good place.

If this had been Japan in my past life, things would have been incredibly awkward.

But this was another world, and Sylphie was understanding. Even if I took two or three wives, all I had to do was love them equally.

As for my other wife, Roxy — she had claimed one of the small rooms upstairs. One of the smallest on the second floor.

I had suggested she take a bigger room, but she apparently preferred a small one.

I didn't mind small rooms myself. They concentrated the scent.

Roxy had become a teacher at the Magic University. When I introduced her there, I also reported my return, but I'll save that story for later.

---

Another month later.

A day of heavy snow.

Sylphie gave birth.

It was an uncomplicated, normal delivery.

Not a breech birth, not premature.

The only issue was that the snow was so heavy we couldn't get a doctor in time.

In my past life, I would have panicked, but thankfully, Lillia was here.

With her extensive experience as a midwife, she took charge of Aisha and moved with crisp efficiency, no instructions from me needed.

Lillia taught Aisha each step of the process, going through everything with care.

As a precaution, Roxy and I stood by at the side — the difference in emergency response between someone who could use Healing Magic and someone who couldn't was enormous.

That said, I was completely rattled at the time.

Healing Magic was the furthest thing from my mind.

I could barely manage to hold Sylphie's hand as she writhed in pain.

"Seeing Lord Rudeus like this reminds me of Lady… Lady Norn's birth," Lillia said.

Her words brought my own memories flooding back.

Norn had been in a breech position, putting both mother and child in danger.

Paul had been useless, just standing there in a daze.

Back then, I had acted calmly. But now, here I was like this.

Being better at it as a child — whether in this life or the previous one, nothing ever changed with me.

"But please don't worry, Lord Rudeus. Lady Sylphie will be fine. There's nothing to worry about."

So saying, Lillia carried on with her work, steady and composed.

Her deftness was something to behold.

Even being told it was fine, my composure wouldn't return.

All I could do was hold Sylphie's hand, call out "hnh, hnh, haa" to her, and wipe the sweat from her forehead.

Sylphie had a pained expression, but seeing me flustered, she gave a little laugh.

"Um… Rudi, maybe you should relax a bit more?"

That remark made Aisha snort.

Lillia smacked Aisha on the head.

Sylphie watched and giggled.

"Nnh!?"

The moment the tension eased, the contractions hit.

"Lady Sylphiette. Yes, please push."

"Nnuuh!"

I quietly watched Sylphie do her best.

The only words that came from my mouth were encouragements.

I felt like I ought to be doing something, but I couldn't.

Sylphie strained with a pained expression, matching Lillia's cues.

And then — she was born.

The baby entered this world safely and let out a healthy cry.

A girl.

A cute little girl with the same hair color as mine.

Lillia lifted her up and placed her in Sylphie's arms.

Sylphie held the baby and let out a sigh of relief.

"Thank goodness… her hair isn't green."

That quiet murmur made me stroke Sylphie's head.

Her beautiful white hair.

The hair that had once been green.

"…Yeah."

I had no intention of blaming Sylphie, even if the baby had been born with green hair.

Of course not.

For me, the color green was the most beautiful color in this world.

Green was Sylphie's color. It was Ruijerd's color.

Even Roxy's hair gleamed emerald green in certain light.

My favorite color was green.

If anyone tried to discriminate against green hair, I would make an enemy of the entire world if I had to.

"Good work, Sylphie."

"Mm."

But even with those feelings, in this world, things were different.

Green hair was taboo all on its own.

To have a daughter born with the same hair color as me — I couldn't help but be grateful to the gods for that luck.

Though, admittedly, my idea of a god was someone crouching in the corner of the room, clutching a staff, face pale as a sheet.

"Here, Rudi. You hold her too."

"Mm."

I held the baby.

A body so warm it was almost hot, a cry so loud it was almost annoying.

Tiny hands, a tiny head, a tiny mouth, a tiny nose…

Everything brimming with life.

Realizing this was my child stirred something deep within my chest.

Sylphie's baby. My baby.

"…"

Tears welled up.

Paul was dead.

But a child had been born.

Paul had let me live.

Without him, I never would have been able to hold this baby.

In exchange, Paul couldn't hold his own wife, his own daughter, his own grandchild.

Would he regret not being here for this moment?

Or would he laugh smugly, saying it was all thanks to him?

Either way, I had to keep living.

For this child's sake, I couldn't die.

I had to protect Sylphie. I had to protect my family.

I would live on in this world.

I would keep on living.

The baby girl was named Lucy, taken from the initials of Rudeus and Sylphie.

Lucy Greyrat.

Aisha laughed, saying it was such an obvious choice, and got smacked on the head by Lillia.

Still, I was glad it was a girl.

If it had been a boy… I might have named him Paul.

---

After that, I was kicked out of the room by Lillia.

She apparently had plenty of things to do and told me to wait outside.

I moved to the living room and sat on the sofa.

I hadn't done much of anything, but I was exhausted.

Roxy sat beside me.

She looked just as drained, sighing softly.

Roxy had done even less than I had.

It was clearly mental fatigue.

"It was my first time witnessing the moment a new life enters the world. It was incredible."

"As for me… I've lost count. Maybe the third time? When it's your own child, it's surprisingly tiring."

Sylphie must have been even more exhausted.

I'd have to do my best to take care of her later.

"…Is that how I was born, too?"

"Well, everyone was born that way, I imagine."

I didn't know much about the biology of the Migurd Race, but as long as they had a human form, the differences probably weren't that great.

"…That's going to be me someday too, isn't it?"

I looked at Roxy. Her face was slightly flushed as she gazed up at me.

I took off my shoes and sat cross-legged on the sofa.

"Yes. I believe I'll be asking you to go through the same thing."

Now that Sylphie's baby was born, it meant my life with Roxy would soon enter that phase too.

Honestly, I was looking forward to it.

Sylphie's baby had just been born and already I was thinking about this. What a terrible person I was.

Then again, I didn't really dislike that part of myself.

Thinking that Paul might have felt the same way made it hard to hate.

I was excited for what lay ahead.

When I smiled at the thought, Roxy's face turned beet red and she hugged her own body.

"Rudi, you're making a really lewd face right now."

"It's in my nature."

Yes, it was in my nature. I had been this way since the day I was born.

"…"

Ah, that's right.

Before settling into that kind of life with Roxy, there was someone I needed to report to about the baby.

---

The next day.

I went to Paul's grave alone.

Paul's grave was in the outskirts — a cemetery for nobles, located on a small hill.

Paul might have complained about being buried alongside nobles, but the maintenance was better than the public graveyard. He'd just have to put up with it.

I stood in the snow before a round Ranoa-style headstone.

I didn't know what Paul's religion had been.

He didn't seem like the type who believed in gods.

Even if something about it was wrong, he wasn't the kind of man who cared about denominations or such things. He'd probably forgive me.

Ideally, the grave should have been in Buena Village in the Asura Kingdom.

This land had no connection to Paul whatsoever.

But if I built it too far from my home, I wouldn't be able to visit regularly.

I had informed Geese and the others about this location.

Once, we had all come together to visit.

Everyone had brought things they thought Paul would have liked — alcohol, daggers, that sort of thing.

Geese and Talhand had thrown a full-blown drinking party in front of the grave and gotten yelled at by the groundskeeper.

I set down the bottle of sake I'd bought along the way and began cleaning Paul's grave.

I brushed the snow off the top of the headstone and polished it with a cloth I'd brought.

It wasn't that much work. The path here was buried in snow, but the cemetery itself had been partially cleared by the groundskeeper.

I finished cleaning, placed the bottle in front of the grave, and clasped one hand in prayer.

I'd thought about buying flowers for the offering, but they weren't for sale.

In these northern lands, finding flowers in winter was no easy task.

Well, I wasn't the kind of man who had a taste for flower-viewing anyway.

"Paul… Dad. A baby was born yesterday. A girl.

She's Sylphie's child, so she's sure to be beautiful."

I sat down in front of the grave and gave my report.

"I wish you could have seen her too."

If Paul had seen Lucy, he would have carried on nonstop, gushed and gushed, until Zenith had to rein him in.

He'd say it was a celebration, drink with me, get completely wasted, harass Lillia, and get disapproved of by Zenith.

I could picture that scene so vividly it was almost absurd.

If only Paul were still alive and Zenith hadn't lost her memory.

"Roxy — Roxy sensei — is my wife now.

Two wives, just like you, Dad.

I wish you could have taught me how to handle that kind of situation."

Come to think of it, back then — in that labyrinth — the words Paul had been about to say to me… had they been about something like this?

When he learned that Roxy had feelings for me, and that I had feelings for Roxy too — had he been about to teach me what it meant to have two wives?

"Unlike you, Dad, I don't suddenly have two daughters. But someday, Roxy will get pregnant and give birth to my child, too.

That's still a ways off, but I hope they grow up healthy and happy, like Norn and Aisha."

I wasn't saying Lillia's parenting was bad, but I wanted my children to grow up treated equally.

I didn't want them twisted by some half-demon-race stigma or anything like that.

"Sylphie seems to think I'm going to take on even more wives down the road.

I have no plans for that, but they do say lightning strikes twice. Maybe she's right…"

Had Paul ever considered marrying someone like Gilleen? Or Elinalise? Or Vera?

He'd apparently had a physical relationship with Gilleen, so surely the thought must have crossed his mind at least once.

Well, Paul had always been more easygoing about that sort of thing than me — or maybe he just never gave it much thought.

"Maybe I shouldn't overthink it, either."

As I posed that question to the headstone, I thought I caught a glimpse of Paul's mischievous grin.

A grin, but no words from Paul.

Still, Paul must have had his own struggles. I felt like he'd always been tormented by something.

In this world, there weren't many people who could live without ever thinking about anything.

"…Dad. I was a terrible son.

I had memories from my past life and all that, and I never properly showed you my love."

I said that, then stood up.

I picked up the sake bottle and took the first drink.

I let the searing burn of the alcohol settle in my throat, then poured the rest liberally over the grave.

"But now, I really do mean to be a proper son."

For Paul — a man who had failed because of alcohol — sake might not be the best thing.

But today, it was fine.

After all, it was a birth celebration.

"Having my own child born and becoming a parent…

I finally understand.

That I was still just a kid.

A brat who was only pretending to be an adult because of memories from a past life."

I drank, I poured, I drank, I poured.

The bottle was empty before long.

"I know I need to grow up quickly.

But I'm sure I'll have to fail a whole lot more before I can.

You were the same way, Dad. I'll do my best too."

I capped the empty bottle and set it before the grave.

"Well, I'll come again. Next time, I'll bring everyone."

With that, I turned my back on Paul's grave.

A lot of things had settled, one way or another.

There had been painful moments, and there had been happy ones.

But it wasn't the end.

I would keep on living in this world.

I would keep on living.

So that I wouldn't have any regrets, no matter when death came.

I meant it with all my heart.

End of Chapter 13 — Adolescence: The Labyrinth Arc

Next Chapter

Chapter 14 — Youth: Daily Life Arc