"I went ahead and decided things on my own again, didn't I? Poor Otto..."
When Subaru returned to his room after the conference,
"But it's hard to imagine Anastasia, who went out of her way to send a messenger, would take that kind of risk. Even with Mimi there, Joshua could've been restrained if they'd really wanted to hold him back."
"The fact that they sent a knight's own family member as their envoy means they've properly acknowledged us as an 'enemy.' I've always watched period dramas and thought, 'Why don't they just cut down the envoys?' when important people get sent as messengers. So that's the backstory behind it. Never thought I'd learn that firsthand."
In essence, it all came down to trust between the two sides.
If word got out that you'd betrayed a debt of honor, your position would be destroyed on the spot. No faction could afford to act with their back against the wall — they still had too many enemies. And the more powerful you became, the more potential enemies you harbored, so it made perfect sense that those in positions of power had to tread carefully in the shadows.
—The conference, which had welcomed Joshua Euclius as a guest, had concluded, and a relaxed evening had settled over the new
Since it wouldn't do to send them back the same day, Subaru and the others had told Joshua and Mimi to stay overnight. The reply had been framed as accepting the invitation to Pristella, the purpose of their visit.
Everyone had noticed that Joshua, who had put on such a magnanimous air when getting down to business, had let a subtle look of relief slip once he'd received a positive response. Subaru figured the monocle was a device to alter the impression he gave — but even accounting for that, the young man was painfully honest by nature.
"Still, he's way more likable than his brother."
"Subaru, you really can't be straightforward with Julius, can you? Are you still holding a grudge about what happened at the castle?"
Hearing Subaru's mutter, Emilia chimed in with an amused expression.
There had been a time when just thinking about it would flush his face with shame and heat his stomach with indignation. But now, after enough time had passed...
"It's not so faded that I can laugh about it, but I was young back then. It's not that I haven't reflected on it. I'd like him to reflect on it too, though."
"I heard that you two properly apologized and made up after the trial, though. Just forgiving someone on the surface while stewing on the inside isn't very knightly, is it?"
"Guh... but I'm only human!"
Under Emilia's reproachful gaze, Subaru stubbornly held his ground.
Emilia glared at his profile for a moment as he turned away, but before long, she couldn't hold back and burst into laughter.
"Fine, fine. Honestly, Subaru, you're such a stubborn mule. But when you meet Julius in Pristella, you can't fight with him, okay? You've become a splendid knight, and knights don't recklessly swing their power around."
"Yes, my lady, I could never best you!"
He feigned silliness to mask his embarrassment, rubbing his upper lip with his finger.
Then, letting his gaze drift absently around Emilia's room, he suddenly remembered something: "Oh, right, Emilia-tan. I don't really know much about Pristella — is it famous? What kind of city is it?"
"Hmm, you really need to study more, Subaru. Pristella is one of Lugnica's five great cities, and it's right on the border with
"That sounds very hearsay-ish, but so it's a city on the water, huh? Well, if Venice could do it back in the old world, I don't see why it couldn't be done here."
In his old world, when it came to a city of water, Venice was the famous one. Canals crisscrossed the city, blending naturally with the stone-built streetscapes — a picturesque locale full of romance that Subaru had always wanted to visit.
That was the impression the description of Pristella had given him, but— "No, that's not it, Subaru. Pristella isn't a city on the water — it's a watergate city."
"A watergate?"
"Right. Since the city was built in the middle of a lake, apparently during heavy rainfall, a lot of water can flood into the city. To prevent that, they've surrounded the city with tall walls and installed numerous watergates to regulate the water flow. Those watergates are incredibly magnificent and famous, so rather than a city on the water, it's called a watergate city."
With Emilia's explanation, the beautiful water city in Subaru's mind transformed into a water prison. The prospect of a beautiful waterscape was completely undermined once you imagined towering walls enclosing everything on all sides.
Why would they build such an ominous structure? Subaru tilted his head in puzzlement.
"I'm not sure about all the details, but there are various theories about the city's origins. Some say they wanted to challenge the limits of the technology of their time, others that they tried to overcome flooding without relying on magic or dragons, and still others that it was built to imprison and defeat some terrible Mabeast or other."
"All of them sound unrealistic yet subtly plausible — that's just human nature for you."
An ordinary person's imagination could hardly reach such heights, but the type of people called geniuses didn't have the brakes called common sense in the first place. And it wouldn't be unusual for them to act on such ideas.
Anyway— "Can't read their intentions any better than before. ...I don't buy that they were just being kind enough to tell us what we're looking for."
"Really? Instead of just doubting everything, why not try trusting people's kindness a bit more?"
"Unfortunately, every last one of the Royal Selection candidates has their quirks. And on top of that, you can't really trust that the goals of the master and servant are in sync."
With the Crusch camp, he could trust Crusch's character, but whether the memory-lost Crusch was still the same gentle lady she'd been when they first met was uncertain. And above all, he couldn't let his guard down around what Felix might pull. It would be nice if Wilhelm was keeping things in check, but even that Sword Devil had his own anxieties. Weighing all those factors, it was difficult to place his full trust.
With the Anastasia camp, it was the same — Anastasia's own movements and thoughts were murky.
Even this invitation was inscrutable. Even if he granted that Julius was the very embodiment of chivalry, it was a fact that Anastasia held the reins. Her personal soldiers, the
With the
If she ever managed to mobilize Reinhard for a legitimate reason and turned hostile, opposing them by force would be nothing but a pipe dream.
And then there was the Priscilla camp — honestly, the hardest to read of all.
Neither master nor servants inspired any trust or confidence from Subaru's perspective. He shared a hometown with Al, but that man was fiercely loyal to Priscilla. He wouldn't give Subaru any special treatment, and Priscilla's own capriciousness was terrifying. There was something utterly irrational about her — she could flash a smile while coming to take your head.
In the end, even after a year had passed, none of the candidates had shown their true hand.
To know them better than he did from that time in the Royal Castle, he'd need to push a bit deeper. In that sense, accepting this invitation was a viable option.
"Honestly, the idea of owing Anastasia a favor scares me. But more importantly — how did they even find out that Emilia-tan is looking for a colorless magic ore?"
"Because we showed
"That's probably what happened. Even if Emilia-tan successfully gets her hands on the magic ore, from the other camps' perspective, things just go back to how they were. We'd only come out slightly ahead."
Of course, once Puck returned, Emilia's combat power would increase by however much she could use magic on her own. But even if Emilia's personal combat ability improved considerably, it wouldn't have that much impact on the overall situation of the Royal Selection.
At best, it would lend credibility to the subjugation of the "
—The subjugation of one of the three great Mabeasts, the "Great Rabbit," at the
Alongside the defeat of the
The problem was that no one had witnessed the moment the Great Rabbit was defeated, and its remains couldn't be submitted as evidence — the manner in which it had been defeated made that impossible.
It had been blown into another dimension, sent to a place beyond this world.
That was the gist of the Great Rabbit's fate, but no matter how seriously you explained it, people simply wouldn't believe you. After all, the Al Shamak that
As a result, the subjugation of the Great Rabbit had been reported to the
If the Great Rabbit wasn't confirmed to appear again for ten years or so, the credibility of the report could be reconsidered — but by that point, even if the achievement was recognized, it would be far too late, frankly speaking.
It was a sudden, out-of-the-blue achievement, so Emilia wasn't particularly hung up on it.
"Still, it's frustrating as hell! Damn, how many times did that rabbit monster make me suffer..."
"But even if no one else believes it, we really did defeat the Great Rabbit. And no one got hurt by that terrifying Mabeast, so isn't that enough?"
"You're too kind and positive, Emilia-tan..."
When you did the right thing, you wanted it to be properly acknowledged.
Talking with Emilia, who showed such magnanimity, made Subaru painfully aware of his own pettiness. In truth, if he could think the way Emilia did, how wonderful that would be. But in reality, Subaru couldn't.
He was genuinely furious about being wrongly assessed — or rather, not assessed at all.
Watching Subaru's sour expression, Emilia's lips softened.
Sometimes, Emilia's eyes would hold a gentle light as she gazed at him, and Subaru never noticed. Nor did he notice that Emilia's expression in those moments carried a complex emotion unlike that of a mother watching over her child, or a maternal instinct toward someone younger — something altogether indescribable.
"As for achievements, the things you worked hard for have been recognized, haven't they? The subjugation of the
"That... it still feels more like I just tagged along, you know? With the White Whale, there were other people who were even more desperate to fight it before me, and I just happened to grab some of the credit at the very end. As for 'Sloth,' that wasn't what I was aiming for at all."
His fight with Petelgeuse had been driven by nothing more than the desire to protect Emilia.
No — that wasn't entirely honest with himself either. In truth, Subaru's feelings toward Petelgeuse had been a mix of wanting to protect Emilia and personal hatred for the man himself.
It wasn't a matter of which feeling won out. Both were Subaru's true feelings, both were selfish.
That was why being praised for what was essentially a private vendetta, dressed up as "for the good of the world and its people," sat uncomfortably.
"With the Great Rabbit too, Subaru — it's the same as what you're thinking. Two Mabeasts that had plagued the world for four hundred years, defeated one after another in such a short time... Coming from me, I know, but it really does feel like too much of a coincidence."
"Yeah, you're right. And the fact that I was involved in both — I've got to admit, that does feel like too much of a coincidence too. Let's just hope I never run into the last one."
"—Yeah, let's hope."
Subaru believed in the power of words and prayed from the bottom of his heart that he would never encounter the so-called "
But before he could probe further— "So, about Pristella..."
The topic was changed.
When Emilia took that kind of attitude, it was a quiet declaration that she didn't want to talk about it. Having learned a thing or two, Subaru didn't force the conversation when that happened.
He did forget that courtesy now and then and act just like he always had, of course.
"So it's settled that we'll accept the invitation, but are you sure the group we discussed earlier is really okay? I'm planning to discuss it with Roswaal later, but—"
"I think broadly that's fine. Emilia-tan is a given, and naturally your knight and your partner Beako will accompany you. For the real deal, as combat power, Garfiel comes, and for some reason Otto's dead set on coming too. Ideally, Petra or Frederica would come too so Emilia-tan wouldn't be inconvenienced, but..."
"Can't be helped. With the meeting of the Western Domain lords coming up, Roswaal will be busy. And Petra accompanying us for her studies was decided a long time ago. She was really upset about it, though."
"Petra's grudge against Roswaal runs deep because of the Sanctuary. Roswaal seems to find it amusing, so
Whether as a maid or a young girl, Petra was growing properly and becoming more capable, but at heart, she still retained a childish fragility. Especially her harsh attitude toward Roswaal, her master, was particularly notable — she wouldn't hesitate to wring a rag into the tea she secretly served him. That said, Subaru's sympathies lay with Petra, so if he happened to witness it, he'd probably look the other way.
Once trust was broken, it could only be restored over a long period. It seemed that one year wasn't enough for Petra to lend an ear to Roswaal's words.
"In that case, with Frederica confirmed to come along as a stopper and a model of decorum, Ram will be left behind at the manor? Man, now I'm getting nervous."
"Maybe. Since it's been mentioned that Annerose might be at this gathering,
"Clind, huh... He's honestly a pretty inscrutable guy too."
Subaru recalled the young man — the all-purpose butler of the Mirlod household, where he'd stayed as a lodger for a while before the manor was renovated.
His polished, extraordinary work performance was so refined that words like "beyond what the eye could follow" — nonsensical as that sounded — actually seemed apt.
Incidentally, the parkour that Subaru was technically learning had its foundations in Clind's instruction. Even though Subaru's physical abilities were firmly in the realm of the ordinary, he'd received guidance from Clind to find techniques of body control and movement that weren't beyond his physical limits.
After moving to the manor, Subaru had visited several times, and on one occasion, Clind — who had come along with Annerose — had observed Subaru's subsequent practice. He had then run through Garfiel's handcrafted athletic zone without so much as a wrinkle in his clothes or a drop of sweat. An absolute monster.
"Well, it doesn't really matter who stays at the manor. What matters is that we be more careful. That goes for you too, Emilia-tan."
"Yeah. I'm sorry for deciding without consulting anyone. I need to properly apologize to Otto later."
"He's not the type to let things go, even if he doesn't care about face. I'll talk to him too. I told Emilia-tan to scold him until he cried."
"Hehe, thanks."
Emilia smiled faintly at Subaru, who pantomimed raising his fist. Then she gently touched her chest — the pendant holding the blue crystal that adorned it.
That crystal was the temporary resting place where the Great Spirit Puck still slumbered.
Not only couldn't it manifest its true power, the stone didn't even have the function to communicate. If Puck so much as stirred inside, it would easily shatter and release his existence — or so Emilia and Beatrice had told him.
If that happened, the uncontrolled Puck would bring massive destruction to its surroundings and eventually fade away to where it originally came from, depleted of mana.
To prevent that, Emilia constantly fed her vast mana into the crystal stone to maintain Puck's existence. All that remained was to craft a suitable crystal stone from a colorless magic ore to hold him in place, and Puck should be able to return.
What Anastasia had brought up this time was the matter of a magic ore that could serve that purpose.
"If I could talk to Puck properly again... There's so much I'd want to say and so much I'd want to ask. So—"
Falling silent and closing her eyes, Emilia left the rest unspoken.
Watching her long lashes tremble faintly, Subaru quietly scratched his head. He could only vaguely guess what Emilia was thinking.
"Hurry back, cat spirit. I've got a mountain of complaints to throw at you too."
And so, as her knight, he offered his consent — mixed with grumbling — to her wishes.
*** "I, for one! I've been thinking about everyone's wellbeing when I speak, you know!"
Otto slammed his glass against the table. Tonight,
Having finished his meeting with Emilia and dinner, Subaru had come to visit Otto before his nightly routine, and had been accompanying the internal affairs official, who had been venting grievances over drinks for some time now.
"He's been at it this whole time. Even my ears hurt from listening."
Garfiel, seated alongside Subaru alongside the table, stated flatly, unable to hide his exasperation. Raking his short hair with his fingers, he clicked his sharp teeth together while sipping from his own glass — filled with milk.
Not giving alcohol to an underage person was a policy Subaru maintained. Incidentally, this had the support of Frederica and Ram, and at Roswaal Manor, drinking was not permitted until the age of twenty. Speaking of which, Garfiel had once been goaded by the bad Otto into tasting alcohol, and despite his temperament, he was apparently hopelessly bad with the stuff.
Since then, he'd developed such an aversion that he grimaced at the mere sight of a bottle.
Naturally, Subaru had no intention of breaking the laws of his original world, so in practice, the only people who drank at the manor were Roswaal and Otto, along with Ram and Frederica.
And in this room, the only one drinking and carrying on was Otto.
"Don't be so bitter. Emilia really does regret deciding on her own this time. She said she should have consulted first. Though I don't think the outcome would've changed."
"It's not just about results, you know. The process matters too. Even if the outcome of a discussion is predetermined before you start talking, that's not uncommon — what matters is the flow of how you get there. Especially this time, we let our guard down and rode along with their invitation... That's what's unacceptable! Right into their palm!"
Otto fired back furiously, spittle flying, in response to Subaru's attempt to smooth things over.
Every point was valid, so there was no arguing, but as Subaru listened— "You really are turning into a full-fledged internal affairs guy... When you were first roped in, you resisted so much. I guess 'what you resist persists' and all that."
"So you're into being coaxed, huh, Otto bro? You're making it all sound so pretty."
"You two haven't changed a bit since the day we met!?"
With a perfectly synchronized one-two combo that left Otto speechless, Subaru and Garfiel exchanged a fist bump. At Roswaal Manor, these three were close in age and shared a certain camaraderie, so they often hung out together. The conversation flowing so neatly into this form was almost aesthetic.
Otto's aptitude as an internal affairs official was undeniable, regardless of his personal feelings. As a merchant's son, he'd received a decent education, and his experience as a traveling salesman had made him streetwise. On top of that, he was sharp-minded and quick-witted — a top-quality hire. Far better to employ him at premium than to let him get swindled somewhere and end up destitute or enslaved.
That said, even while buried in paperwork, the man still tilted his head and muttered, "This isn't how I imagined things would go..." A stubborn lot.
Nowadays, he'd settled into the roles of Roswaal's secretary and Emilia's aide, and was deeply immersed in the Marquis Mathers domain's administration — escape was now utterly impossible.
"What's with that pitying look in your eyes? You look like you're watching a bird about to be wrung."
"This is more the look of watching a bird that's been spared from egg-laying duty in exchange for staying in a cage."
"That's even worse!?"
"Keep it down, you're spilling. And boss, don't tease Otto bro too much. We agreed on a limit of ten Ottos a day, remember?"
"What kind of unit is that?! What does 'ten Ottos a day' even mean?!"
Otto's face went crimson as he shouted, but Subaru and Garfiel offered no response.
This was what happened when alcohol started to kick in. They held these drinking sessions regularly for Otto's stress management, considering his high-stress line of work — but Subaru was starting to wonder if the drinking sessions themselves were adding to Otto's stress.
"Well, screaming like this is probably Otto's best outlet."
"I'm not satisfied!"
"Sure, sure. Otto bro, just sit tight and pour yourself another. Anyway, boss, there's something I want to confirm too."
"Oh? That's unusual. Sure."
Grumbling under his breath, Otto refilled his glass and began sipping again.
With that in his peripheral vision, Garfiel — his mouth still white with milk — said: "Let's cut to the chase — it's gotta be about this enemy's aim, right? Until now, none of the other candidates have even started petty squabbles, but now they're picking an out-and-out fight with us. Can't just do nothing, can we?"
"So you're saying it feels like they've slapped down a formal duel challenge or something?"
"You bet. They've obviously got the will to fight. That scrawny Joshua guy aside, there was that cat-person girl next to him, right?"
—Calling her a "girl" when she's the same age as you, you know— Subaru didn't say it, thinking it would be in poor taste, but what was up with Mimi? To Subaru's eyes, Mimi had seemed her usual self, innocently reaching for tea and snacks.
Of course, dinner had been the same.
"That little one's actually really strong, isn't she? I thought she was only staring me down in that room, but she was doing the same thing in the dining hall during dinner too. She definitely figured out I was the strongest one in that room."
"Really...? I mean, Mimi is pretty strong, and she does have a vaguely battle-junky vibe, but..."
She didn't seem like the type who could keep those thoughts hidden behind a poker face. Frankly, she struck Subaru as an open-book, head-in-the-clouds kind of girl.
"At the very least, I've been on my guard while she's in the manor. Once we're over there, if you can help it, avoid going off alone with Emilia. Otto bro aside, if you or Emilia get taken out, there's no recovering from that."
"I'll have you know, if I'm gone, this domain is finished, you know! I wish you'd appreciate that a little more!"
Garfiel was sounding the alarm, but he wasn't dismissing Otto's usefulness.
He was pressing the point so hard precisely because he wanted Subaru to take the warning seriously. Of course, he hadn't forgotten the chance to have some fun at Otto's expense in the process.
"On that note, I can't deny you're reliable. There's a lot I could say, but to keep it short — I'm counting on you, Garfiel."
"Oh yeah, count on me! The 'Ultimate Shield,' reborn as the 'Legend of Guardian,'
He struck a pose, pointing at himself with his thumb, and Subaru nodded at the proud Garfiel.
Sipping his own glass of milk, Subaru reflected that maybe Garfiel's title was a bit too cool.
When Garfiel eventually performed feats of valor that rocked the kingdom, would he be able to come up with a title even better than this one? Could he put that much trust in his own future inspiration?
"Whether another flash of brilliance like Invisible Providence will visit me again... The goddess smiles on me completely at random, so there's no telling."
"Don't go thinking too hard, boss. But you don't need to worry about it. When the time comes, you're a man who'll get it done. I'm counting on that too."
Emilia was one thing, but Garfiel's trust was also remarkably compelling. It made Subaru feel naturally that he had to put in the effort to live up to it.
Of course, he intended to avoid the mistake of thinking that mindlessly sprinting without a goal was the best way to repay that trust.
"Well, with Garfiel on our side, our camp's combat power is solid for now. Emilia-tan's strong on her own too, and with Beako around, I'm decent. The only question mark is Otto, but... are you actually coming?"
"Of course! If I don't go, who knows what kind of absurd conclusion Emilia and Natsuki-san will reach in their meetings! I'd be beside myself with worry!"
To think that he was this distrusted when it came to negotiations — in a way, it was almost refreshing.
Emilia was as honest and innocent as she looked, and Subaru was poorly socialized despite his stubborn personality. From Otto's perspective, being considered a pushover was only natural.
"And speaking of Pristella, it happens to be the birthplace of the founder of Kararagi, once known as 'Hoshin of the Wastes.' Being on the border adjacent to Kararagi, it's an incredibly significant place from a merchant's perspective. I've been thinking for a while now that I should visit at least once."
"You already washed your hands of the merchant life ages ago. What are you gonna do now?"
"I'll have you know, if you think I'm content being an internal affairs official here forever, you're sorely mistaken! My ultimate goal is still to become a great merchant with my own shop! Being here is just a necessary detour on the way to my destination!"
"A detour might end up being your final destination too, though."
The whole thing about leaving was pretty unrealistic, but with the draw of a place he'd always dreamed of and the role of supporting negotiations as an internal affairs official, there was no denying the legitimacy of Otto's participation.
For all their talk, everyone in this place — no, everyone at Roswaal Manor — understood that things didn't run without Otto. And Otto knew that too, which was exactly why, despite it seeming like a raw deal on the surface, he stayed.
"Well, there's also the masochism angle, but let's set that aside—"
"I feel like you just agreed with something incredibly rude, was that my imagination?"
"It's no big deal. With a shrewd operator like Anastasia involved, there's no telling what kind of unfavorable conditions they'll throw at us. I'm counting on you too. Otto for the pen, Garfiel for the sword. And I'll be the entertainment."
"Try harder!!"
There was such a thing as the right person for the right job.
No matter how hard Subaru tried from now on, he couldn't become stronger than Garfiel. No matter how desperately he studied, he couldn't catch up to Otto as a useful official.
"I've got my own things to do. I'll sit down with Beako and talk it through carefully, then figure out the best way to handle things positively."
"With Emilia and Beako around, the boss should be fine for the most part. So yeah, I've got no choice but to cover Otto bro. Keep your guard up."
"Why am I being treated like the biggest liability..."
Subaru was resigned to it, and Garfiel looked like he'd accepted babysitting duty. Otto grumbled and sipped his alcohol.
And so, as the evening deepened to a comfortable lull— "Alright, it's going to be another busy day tomorrow, so I think I'll turn in. What about you, Garfiel?"
"I'm gonna keep drinking with Otto bro a while longer. Besides, I'm finally racking up some wins in Shatranj. I've got the edge while he's drunk."
As Subaru stood to leave, Garfiel pulled out a game board and pieces from the back of the room. It was a board game called Shatranj — in terms of rules, similar to shogi or chess. How wonderful that such games existed in every world, Subaru mused.
Otto happened to be quite good at this kind of game, and Garfiel had been racking up losses despite his best efforts. Incidentally, Subaru was extraordinarily skilled at Othello, but when it came to shogi or chess, he became useless.
"Don't stay up too late. You'll stop growing."
"Yeah, I've heard that before and I've been doing it, but I don't think it actually works. I haven't felt like I've grown much this past year."
"With you, it's hard to tell because Frederica's been sucking some of your height away."
"My damn sister!"
Garfiel bared his teeth and made a fuss, slamming the Shatranj board onto the table. Then he hunched his shoulders and carefully arranged the small pieces — quite the contrast.
Looking down at his back, Subaru waved at the red-faced Otto: "Don't drink too much either, Otto. If you're useless with a hangover, you'll end up being looked down on by Petra too."
"That girl's been giving me a harder time lately, I think? Or is that just me? Say something to her on my behalf."
"You mean she's being too soft?"
"Could you ask her to go even softer?!"
That was clearly an impossible request, and Subaru answered with a wry smile, leaving the two to glare at each other across the game board as he exited the room.
The magic crystal set in the corridor told him it was nearly time for the date to change. Normally, this was when he'd be turning in at his own room, but— "Running a bit later than usual tonight."
Muttering that excuse to himself, Subaru climbed not the stairs to the east wing's third floor, where his room was, but instead headed for the west wing, where the women's rooms were lined up.
And then— "—Excuse me."
Before entering that room, Subaru always knocked on the door.
He knew there would be no response. And yet, he couldn't help but hope.
Or perhaps he confirmed the silence to make sure he never forgot.
To make sure he never forgot the heat of the flame that burned ceaselessly within his chest.
"———"
Opening the door, he was greeted by the room, now completely dark after sunset.
A spare room. Its layout was no different from the countless guest rooms in the manor, and it actually had noticeably fewer furnishings. In the center, a bed; at the window, curtains; and a small, simple table with a vase of flowers — the only touches of care.
Even knowing that no one would complain about it, Subaru didn't like the attitude of prioritizing purely practical concerns.
Called sentimental or overly nostalgic, he still sought human warmth. The day he might discard that as weakness might never come for him.
The women close to him had expressed sentiments like: "If you were the kind of person who could brush it off that way, Subaru, we might never have understood each other no matter how many times we fought. That's why I really, really like you just as you are."
"It's not a good habit to want things when you don't have enough. If it were just you alone, it would be truly reckless. ...But now that you're not alone, I'll make sure you get what you want, even if you're greedy about it."
"I'm getting way too spoiled. And Emilia-tan, stop confusing me with those cryptic remarks."
He wished they wouldn't casually throw around words like "like" and "handsome."
Even if Subaru clearly expressed his feelings, Emilia's emotional growth hadn't caught up yet. In terms of romantic interest between a man and a woman, nothing had progressed between them whatsoever.
That said, even if things did suddenly progress, Subaru's heart wasn't ready either. Two years, three at least — no, if possible, even more. That was how hopeless he was.
"Man, coming to your room and talking about Emilia and Beatrice the whole time — that's pretty rude of me. If Petra heard, she'd really give me an earful."
In fact, Petra might well be the most perceptive person in the manor when it came to the nuances between men and women, despite her age. For all his bravado, Subaru was hopeless at romance, and the rest of the household — led by Roswaal, whose devotion went from earnest to toxic — were all weak in that department.
Garfiel's feelings for Ram didn't extend beyond what you'd see from a middle schooler, and Subaru was hardly one to talk. Ram's excessive loyalty was hard to pin down as romantic love, and as for Frederica, that was completely unknown. Otto occasionally claimed to have had flings at drinking parties, but they unanimously agreed he was lying to save face.
To be beaten out by a thirteen-year-old girl — his adult dignity was in ruins.
"Thinking about it... even if
Saying that as he pulled up a chair, Subaru sat down beside the bed.
Through the gap in the curtains, a sliver of moonlight fell, barely illuminating the face of the sleeping girl in the bed.
White skin bathed in moonlight, cherry-pink lips. Short blue hair, a surprisingly feminine figure wrapped in a thin negligee, her chest rising and falling with regular breathing — a sleeping princess.
—A girl who had continued to sleep like this for over a year now.
"I've got a lot to report today. An uninvited guest brought some pretty outrageous problems along. Let me start from this morning—"
Subaru spoke softly to the sleeping girl, his expression gentle.
His tone was light and easygoing as always, but his voice was remarkably tender. Like someone coaxing a napping child, he cheerfully recounted the events of the day.
The girl offered no reply. And yet, these nightly visits continued.
On this night, especially full of things to say, their quiet exchange of dreams lasted until the moon had tilted even further in the sky.