"——Subaru knows just how painful it is to be forgotten. That's exactly why he would never, even as a joke, say anything about forgetting someone."
"———"
Right before returning to the room, the voice from inside made Subaru instinctively hold his breath.
He couldn't see who was speaking, but the beautiful, silvery voice belonged to
The deep trust woven into that voice — and an equally powerful plea alongside it.
It was directed at "
"……He wouldn't even joke about it. You're right. For once, Lady Emilia is the correct one."
The one who spoke, her tone laced with self-mockery, was
It was admonishment. Regret. The wretched continuation of a vow that could never reach its destination.
"Ram……"
"Just idle chatter of no consequence — let it pass. The same goes for before. You'd only worry Lady Emilia and the others. For the sake of Ram's dignity, keep silent. If you say anything……"
"———"
"……You really don't remember at all, do you."
Maybe she'd been about to say something like "if you speak, I'll make you regret it." Or maybe Subaru should have beaten her to the punch and tossed those words at her himself.
Just as she had when she'd sought some way to hold onto her sister's existence, Ram looked at Subaru with a flicker of dejected loss in her pale crimson eyes. That sentimentality vanished in the span of a blink.
Was it strength or weakness that wouldn't let her say anything more?
He couldn't read the depths of her heart.
All that remained was a faint trace of where she had once clung to his chest.
"——I apologize for the wait. I've returned."
Without giving him a moment to dwell on it, Ram resumed walking and stepped into the room. That obstinate posture was, perhaps, the clearest expression of her unwavering will. If so, Subaru could at least extend the courtesy of not commenting on it.
When Subaru followed her back inside, a somewhat strained atmosphere had settled over the room.
Still, it was considerably better than right after his shocking confession.
As if to prove it, after Emilia greeted him with "Welcome back," the one who then spoke up was ——, "……I apologize for my disgraceful behavior earlier. May I try once more?"
"O-oh. Same here — I kinda, you know, caught everyone off guard… Ah, no, it'd be rude to interrupt. Go ahead."
"There's no need to be so stiff. Having you treat me with such formality makes me rather uncomfortable."
With a thin smile, the beautiful young man with violet hair spoke — Julius.
He was the one who had gone pale right after Subaru's confession. Subaru didn't know how much effort Emilia and
Still, there were Ram's words in the hallway. ——When she'd heard about Julius, she'd told Subaru that he was cruel. What on earth had that meant?
"Let me introduce myself properly. I am Julius Juukulius. I serve as knight to Lady Anastasia, who is present here. You and I are friends… or something of the sort."
"Got it, nice to meet you… Why do you sound so unsure about it?"
"As it happens, it wouldn't be surprising if our respective perceptions diverged slightly. I considered us friends, but whether you felt the same……"
"Lost to the sands of memory, huh?"
"……That's about the size of it."
Subaru's lips curved at the subtle elegance threaded through Julius's words.
According to Emilia, they'd journeyed through harsh conditions together — and given that Julius had been the only other male in the group, they'd presumably grown comfortable enough with each other.
That aside, Julius's knightly bearing and his earlier remark were telling. Even in his current state, Subaru figured his first impression of Julius before losing his memories couldn't have been all that positive.
"There's nothing to worry about. Subaru and Julius are super-duper close! I can promise you that — we were there together the whole time."
"That's right. There's really no need to worry about that, is there? The knight's big problem is way more serious than that."
Emilia cut in, hands on her hips, while Meili chimed in with a mischievous glint in her eye.
Emilia's words were born from genuine concern about Subaru and Julius's first meeting, but Meili's held something else entirely — a different calculation lurking beneath.
When Subaru furrowed his brow at that, Julius nodded as though catching her drift.
"True. Just as Meili says. Subaru, we need to discuss the changes that have occurred to you, but the problem we're facing extends beyond that. Allow me to explain here as well."
"Does this have to do with Lady Anastasia, who's been acting strange since this morning?"
"……An astute observation, Lady Ram."
Julius lowered his eyes slightly in response to Ram's remark from against the wall. Upon hearing that, Ram narrowed her gaze toward Anastasia and let out a small sigh.
"Barusu, hand over the bucket. I'm preparing the meal."
"……Aren't we in the middle of an important conversation?"
"We're in the same room. I can hear everything perfectly well. ……It's easier to keep my composure if my hands are busy."
Brusquely, Ram snatched the bucket of water from Subaru's grasp and headed toward the luggage piled in the corner of the room. He could see her slight back beginning the work she'd announced — preparing breakfast.
"Sorry. Ram isn't normally like that, you know……"
"Don't worry about it. I understand how she feels. ——Imagine having desperately wanted information, only to watch it slip out of reach right before your eyes."
Emilia's apology was met with a slow shake of Anastasia's head. Her response drew troubled expressions from both Emilia and Beatrice.
Subaru couldn't understand the catch they'd hit — but the answer came moments later, from Anastasia's own lips.
"Now, I'm reluctant to pile further surprises onto an already chaotic morning… but concealing this will only breed discord. So, trusting that the soil is fertile enough to receive it, I'll come clean."
"……She's being so pretentious and roundabout. Shall we get to the point already?"
"There's no need to be so frightened, Beatrice. ——You and I are probably like sisters with a deeper connection than you realize. As you've no doubt guessed."
"———"
At Anastasia's words, Beatrice's cheeks stiffened. Naturally, the girl standing beside Subaru reached out and gently pinched the hem of his sleeve, as if seeking something to hold onto.
Watching from the corner of his eye, Subaru hesitated for a moment before taking her hand. His fingertips trembled faintly with surprise, but the small palm quickly accepted the warmth.
"……Your relationship with your contractor is heartwarming and ideal. I too once envisioned such a bond with Ana, but things haven't been going well."
"You refer to Anastasia like she's someone else. Just as I thought — you really are……"
"Yes, your conjecture is correct. ——The will currently inhabiting this body is not Ana's.
Emilia caught her breath, and the hand Subaru held tightened. Julius wore a look of deep anguish, Meili maintained her bored expression as always, and only
With her back turned, working away, Ram's expression was impossible to read.
And Subaru alone ——, "……I have absolutely no clue what's being talked about."
Left out of the exchange as a matter of course, he could do nothing but wear a bewildered expression.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — In short, the girl who had introduced herself as Anastasia Hoshin was now dominated by an entirely different existence, and her consciousness lay in a deep slumber.
That was, roughly speaking, what the spirit calling herself
The revelation was apparently shocking for Emilia and Beatrice as well, but for Subaru, it was less a shock and more a further acceleration of his already incomprehensible situation.
Subaru's mind held no lingering impressions of Anastasia to begin with. Even being told that the person he'd been introduced to in their first greeting was actually someone else — "……O-oh. So, um. That's… a big deal, right?"
— he could do little more than voice a detached, secondhand sentiment.
Naturally, that this was an extremely serious matter was clear enough from the reactions of everyone around him. After all, the very reason they had come to this tower was at stake.
They had come to this tower seeking a way to save the girl who remained asleep and the people who appeared to be afflicted by some illness. ——Or at least, that was what he'd been told.
"Here we are, just arrived at the tower and ready to push forward, and the key player is in tattered condition. Barusu has lost what few memories he had, and Lady Anastasia's consciousness is swallowed by the abyss."
"Oh… there's not a single bright spot in sight…"
Summed up so succinctly by Ram, Subaru wanted to clutch his head.
The problems were mounting. First, Subaru hadn't even fully grappled with his own situation. In a state like that, being confronted with one crisis after another left him unable to move.
This was going nowhere ——, "I don't think moping around with our heads down is going to help anyone. I totally understand the urge to wallow — I do. But it's no good to just feel sorry for ourselves."
"———"
"We came all the way to this tower carrying the hopes of so many people. It's incredibly serious that Subaru and Anastasia are in trouble, I know. But—"
Emilia clapped her hands, drawing everyone's attention, then paused.
After a beat of silence, Emilia swept her deep violet eyes across everyone in the room and — "We can't stop moving forward. ——That's what we've always been taught. Don't ever give up."
Her voice firm, Emilia let her gaze settle on each face in the room in turn. When those eyes finally locked on Subaru, he felt as though he'd been pierced by their beautiful violet light, his throat going tight.
Naturally, his chest grew warm. He didn't know what to say. But there was expectation in that gaze. Receiving it, Subaru felt the compulsion to move, and he tightened his grip.
"Ow! That hurts! Hey, Subaru!"
"Ah, sorry… No, it's not bad. This is proof that I'm pumped up."
"Grinning about it doesn't make it hurt any less! You should reflect on what you did!"
"S-sorry. Hurting you was wrong. But I'm not wrong about being fired up. Yeah, that's right."
After apologizing to Beatrice, whose delicate hand had nearly been crushed, Subaru shook his head.
He understood the urge to wear a bitter expression. But agonizing over unsolvable problems wasn't going to move anyone forward. His own experience had taught him that much.
If Subaru had been alone, he'd have surely despaired in this situation. But Subaru wasn't alone. Even without his memories, Emilia and the others were there, reaching out to him because they cared. If that was the case ——, "Look, I'm sorry my missing memories are causing trouble for everyone. But that doesn't automatically make this situation hopeless. Think about it from a different angle. The me of right now — unshackled by unnecessary attachments, my mind might be bursting with bold, fresh ideas. That could be the key to breaking through this impasse!"
"……That's a pretty optimistic way of looking at it, isn't it?"
"What good does being pessimistic do? The important stuff is always out in front. They say the goddess of fortune has you by the forehead, not by the back of the head, right? Besides, conquering this tower — maybe what it takes is exactly that kind of flexible thinking. The kind that isn't bound by this world's fixed ideas — an otherworlder's perspective!"
Subaru pushed back Echidna's skepticism with the same momentum that had driven his impromptu speech. The words were bravado, pure bluster — but right now, the atmosphere needed to be shaken up.
Reading Subaru's intent, even those who had been wearing troubled expressions began to shift.
"……You know what? You're right. Subaru has always found a way through all sorts of terrible situations. So I'm sure he'll get through this too."
"Ha, I appreciate the vote of confidence! Though that does mean I'm the one who has to do the heavy lifting, huh? I'll try my hardest, especially with all these cute girls cheering me on."
"Thanks, Subaru. ——Yeah. I'm glad. Subaru is Subaru after all."
"———"
Emilia's soft whisper — rich with relief — caught Subaru completely off guard.
— Subaru is Subaru.
Her murmur, born from the very depths of her heart, brought Subaru a measure of relief too.
This might just work out.
He could gradually fill the gaps between himself and the Natsuki Subaru that Emilia knew. If he did that, then surely even their awkward, stilted relationship would start to smooth out.
"……My, my. How optimistic."
"Oh?"
The sudden remark came from Julius, directed at Subaru who had just relaxed in response to Emilia's words. Julius shrugged, and when Subaru looked his way, he offered a slight smile and said, "It's nothing."
"Whether or not you have your memories, I see that you're still incapable of distinguishing between bravery and recklessness. Perhaps losing the memories of just how formidable the obstacles before us are has enabled this kind of thinking."
"You're one to talk — that's quite the practiced sneer you've got there. That your real personality? I mean — your true self? You're Julius… Julius, right?"
"……I see. As Lady Emilia says, perhaps the presence or absence of memory is a trivial matter after all. However one looks at it, a person's roots don't change easily."
"I'm actually starting to get a pretty good picture of what kind of dynamic we had. It's a relief that we're both the easy-to-read type."
Their exchange wasn't hostile enough to be called hostile, yet too edged to be called friendly. But Subaru felt certain that this was the right distance between him and Julius.
His first impression hadn't been wrong. When Subaru and Julius first met, neither had walked away with a favorable opinion of the other. What circumstances had led them to accept traveling together to the tower — well, that was a story for another time ——, "Nice to work with you again, Julius. Try to keep it moderately difficult until my memories come back."
"Fine. I shall accept this as part of my duty. ——Memories are trivial. Yes, indeed. ……Quite right."
With a quiet nod of acknowledgment, Julius concluded the conversation.
His memories were gone, and problems continued to pile up. It was certainly not a situation where anyone could wear a cheerful face — but even so, there was strength in being able to lift one's head.
"That the person involved isn't taking it too seriously is probably its own saving grace, in a way."
"It's just not showing on the surface. Inside, it's a full-on storm. But hey, Emilia-chan is going to comfort me sweetly and tenderly later — just the two of us."
"……? You mean a lap pillow?"
"Oh — no, sorry. That might be going a little too far…"
Puffing out his chest with bravado, Subaru deflated the instant it went to his head. He couldn't believe he'd flinched at the thought of Emilia actually agreeing to comfort him tenderly.
And a lap pillow at that. Naturally, his gaze drifted to her soft-looking, white thighs ——, "Everything's ready. Help me carry it, Barusu-pervert."
"Ow!?!"
A sharp kick to the back of the knee sent Subaru to the ground with a cry. Looking down at him with an expression that practically screamed "disgusting" was Ram.
"Your irrational positivity is one of Barusu's few redeeming qualities. Put it to good use and apply that same enthusiasm to the meal prep, the cleanup, sweeping, and every other menial chore under the sun."
"That's just because you want to make your own life easier, isn't it……"
"Oh, Master! I'll help too~! Food! Food!"
Subaru's protest against Ram's authoritarian decree was drowned out by Shaula, who launched herself at the meal preparations with all the restraint of someone who simply couldn't wait any longer. Watching Shaula carry plates, Subaru resigned himself and joined in.
"The menu is… well, it sure screams 'preserved rations.'"
"Because it literally is preserved rations. Thanks to Lady Emilia, we managed to carry some perishables in, but those have run their course. From here on, it's going to be nothing but bland, tasteless meals."
"Then I guess we'd better conquer this tower fast and get back to civilization."
He'd heard somewhere that a person's peace of mind only truly begins once food, clothing, and shelter are in order. By that measure, life in this tower was deeply uncertain.
Coupled with his lack of memory, these bland preserved rations were becoming the baseline of Subaru's "taste of another world." That was rough.
"Sorry to bring this up over the meal, but there's something I'd like to confirm with you, Natsuki-kun."
"Starving, starving… Huh, me? What do you want to know?"
Subaru had been in the middle of role-playing — summoned to another world, cast into slavery, griping about his poor meals — when Echidna's question made him pause mid-bite.
"I know we've only just united around staying positive, so forgive the interruption, but I'd like to share what we know about what happened to you. After all, the only change triggered by coming to this tower has been your memory loss. Paradoxically speaking, none of us know when or where we might experience the same phenomenon."
"Fair point. Speaking from experience — well, sort of — memory loss is a real pain."
"You're really treating this as though it's someone else's problem…."
Beatrice gave Subaru an exasperated look as he nodded in understanding.
Still, Echidna's concern wasn't unwarranted. Subaru himself needed to know the circumstances behind his memory loss. The key to recovering his memories had to be connected to whatever had caused them to vanish.
"———"
Seated at the table, Beatrice on his right and Emilia on his left, Subaru had awakened to find these two by his side. The unexplainable trust and affection they directed toward him — he wanted to know what kind of memories had given rise to those feelings.
— No, he had to recover those memories. That was the duty he'd been given.
"Even so, I basically woke up and was told my memory was gone, so I'm still pretty fuzzy on the details. ……How did you guys find me, exactly?"
"Well… when morning came and we couldn't find Subaru anywhere — not on the dragon carriage, not in our room on the fourth floor — we started to worry…"
Dragon carriage. The term snagged his attention, but Subaru didn't interrupt for fear of derailing the conversation. It probably had something to do with the lizard — earth dragon — he'd seen in the green room. Some kind of horse-drawn carriage, he assumed. His curiosity about seeing one in person could wait.
"Betty wasn't as panicked as Emilia. But when you can't find your contractor in this enigmatic tower, it is rather troublesome. So I searched the tower together with Emilia…"
"Searched?"
"We found you collapsed in that white library on the third floor and carried you to the green room."
Emilia and Beatrice's joint explanation prompted a long exhale from Subaru.
"The third floor is one of the multiple floors that comprise this tower. We are currently on the fourth floor. The goal is to reach the first floor, the topmost level, and complete the conquest. The third floor has already been cleared — through none other than your ingenuity."
"Thanks for the supplementary explanation. ……My ingenuity, huh."
Julius filled in the parts that were lacking with characteristic precision. That said, the content struck Subaru as somewhat lacking in credibility.
But to Subaru's reaction, Emilia picked up with "It's true—"
"That really is what happened. We were all completely lost, but Subaru figured it all out by himself in no time. He was soooo cool."
"Ha, thanks. ……'Completely lost' — haven't heard that one in a while."
"———"
"Did I say something weird?"
He'd meant it as a bashful deflection of the compliment, but something had struck Emilia silent. For an instant, Subaru saw her eyes shimmer with deep emotion, though he couldn't tell what it was.
In any case, the ripple on the surface faded before he could pursue it.
"So, about the part where you carried me to that plant-filled room……"
"That room is protected by a special spirit. That spirit has the power to heal wounds — that's why we also placed
"Got it, got it. So that's how I ended up there. ……By the way, is there a chance that room is what caused my memory loss?"
"That's……"
Emilia's response suggested the possibility had never occurred to her, and Subaru closed one eye.
This was nothing more than a hunch on Subaru's part, but the spirit's intentions were unknown — and if it took the form of a plant, then some degree of cruelty wasn't out of the question, was it?
Just as a flower uses its beautiful appearance and sweet nectar to lure insects into carrying pollen.
Or like carnivorous plants that lure prey through mimicry, then drain it of all life.
In exchange for healing the body, it devours one's memories. ——Was that possibility on the table?
"That's a rather imaginative hypothesis, but it seems unlikely. If that were the case, then I — having entered that room earlier and for longer than you — should have been the first to experience such a change."
"……The original owner of this body hasn't woken up. Is that unrelated to this supposed anomaly?"
"Ana's situation predates coming to this tower. Its connection to the green room is negligible. Now then… did the earth dragon in that room forget you?"
"What?"
"That earth dragon was extremely attached to you. If the spirit in that room truly had a nasty habit of draining memories, she would likely have turned away from you."
At Echidna's words, Subaru recalled the earth dragon that had padded over to him right after he'd woken up.
True enough, that dragon had been remarkably friendly with him. If the reason was that it had originally been Subaru's dragon, then that made sense. And yet, it also came as a surprise.
"That dragon was a female……?"
"Let me refocus. The chances of that room having done you harm are quite slim. Rather, I believe the problem lies in the room where you were found unconscious — the overgrown library on the third floor, wasn't it?"
"Yeah, exactly. That room — I was lying on the white floor…"
Recounting that moment, Emilia gripped her own wrist tightly.
"We hurriedly carried you from there to the green room, and I was about to go call for everyone, but…"
"While I was calling out, Subaru woke up, and he was already like this. So chronologically, it's unlikely the green room was involved. ……It must be that library."
If there was a problem, the cause had to lie in that library.
It seemed they'd reached a consensus, though Subaru himself wasn't making the connection. The idea of what kind of room a "library" even was simply exceeded his capacity to imagine.
"That, Taigeta… Taigeta library — what kind of room is it? The name rings a faint bell, somehow……"
"That library houses the 'Books of the Dead.'"
"The 'Books of the Dead'… That's some pretty chuuni stuff, isn't it."
Setting aside his reaction to the name, Subaru latched onto the concept of the "Books of the Dead." Receiving this, Julius lowered his chin and continued, "There's no certainty, but—"
"In that library, books bearing the names of the dead from nations across the world are arranged in rows. Reading them requires qualifications. Presumably, one can only read the book of a dead person connected to oneself."
"Another disturbing… What's written in those books?"
"Roughly, the life of that deceased person. Their most intense thoughts sear themselves into your brain. It's not exactly something you'd care to revisit repeatedly."
Julius's explanation carried the weight of firsthand experience — something only the person who'd lived it could convey.
The notion of a dead person's thoughts burning into one's brain did not, put plainly, sound like something anyone would want to experience. And if Subaru had collapsed in a library where such an encounter was possible ——, "——Did I collapse after reading one of those books? Did it, like, fry my brain or something?"
"It can't be ruled out entirely, can it? As the 'Sage' among us, what's your take on that?"
"……Are you maybe asking me?"
Echidna nodded in agreement with Subaru's suspicion, then cast a meaning-laden glance toward Shaula. The implication of that gaze was just as incongruous as the title "Sage" — a label that couldn't have been more ill-suited to Shaula.
If anything, it would be fair to say Shaula was the person in this room most distant from anything resembling a sage.
"I've said it before and I'll say it again — my answer's the same every time! I don't know a thing about this tower except the rules. I was told to crack down on rule-breakers, and that's it. Whatever Master does in this tower, it has nothing to do with me."
"For starters, I still don't even know why Shaula calls me Master in the first place……"
"Rest assured. On that count, Barusu's answer was the same even before you lost your memory. He's been happily taking advantage of the convenience without saying a word. ……Howpicable."
"I didn't just get told off on my own, did I?!"
Shaula's gaze, brimming with maximum affection, left Subaru with no recourse but bewilderment.
Being the object of a gorgeous woman's warmth might sound enviable in the abstract, but when its source was a complete mystery, it only generated bewilderment.
And beyond that, there was something fundamentally strange about her affection and fondness — something entirely different from the earnest devotion Emilia and Beatrice directed toward him.
Whether that was a side effect of his missing memory, Subaru couldn't tell.
"In any case, that library is the prime suspect. If there's a clue to restoring my memories there, then it's worth investigating."
"I agree. We're already knee-deep in problems — fewer is always better. And this situation has made something abundantly clear."
"What's that?"
"——Just how much you were compensating for, Subaru."
At Julius's words, Subaru closed one eye and gave a quiet snort through his nose.
Not from embarrassment, but from a genuine, wry laugh. This was going too far — putting far too much stock in him. To think that Natsuki Subaru had been carrying that much of the weight. Terminal illness upon terminal illness.
Just when you thought things couldn't get worse, they did. He was reacquainting himself, quite consciously, with just how much of a burden he'd been without even realizing it.
"Anyway, after we finish eating, I want to go check out that library. If my lost memories are scattered around in there, I'd like to pick them up and put them back together."
"You always say things like that. You really are Subaru, aren't you."
"'You really are Subaru' — that's not a compliment, is it?!"
Subaru deliberately deflected with a lighter tone, and Emilia offered a faint smile. The atmosphere in the room loosened, just slightly.
A plan was set, and for the first time, it genuinely felt like they'd taken a step forward.
"I hate to interrupt this moment, but there's one more thing I'd like to ask you, Natsuki-kun."
"Well, at this point, go ahead and fire away. What is it?"
"Oh, it's nothing — this really has nothing to do with your memories or conquering the tower. It's just a personal curiosity of mine…"
With that preface, Echidna ran her fingers through her loosely waved hair. And then, amidst her otherwise charming expression, only her pale blue eyes took on a deep, incisive intelligence as she spoke: "That word you keep using — 'isekai.' What exactly does it mean?"