——It was a furious voice that brought a piercing sense of déjà vu to Subaru.
"The stench of the
This was the second time Subaru had been met with such open hostility on that basis.
Garfiel, who could smell what Subaru himself could not, and who looked upon him with loathing as though gazing at the murderer of his own parents.
Subaru already knew the sharpness of that gaze, the torrent of that animosity.
The Witch's miasma. The lingering scent of sin. One bewitched by the Witch.
She had said as much, reviling Subaru, and their relationship had deteriorated to the point where she had once tried to take his life.
"What's with that vacant look on your face? Did I hit the mark so hard you can't even open your mouth, huh?"
To Subaru, whose throat was choked with shock and agitation, Garfiel continued lashing out with his inexhaustible fury. His arms hung limp at his sides, but his wariness had not slackened in the least.
His posture—eyes sharp, every movement of Subaru tracked—had utterly chased away whatever faint sense of rapport might have existed between them.
"So, this stench of the Witch..."
"Hah?"
"You're saying this smell drifting off me has been present since we left the graveyard—since after the 'Trial'?"
"Yeah. I mean, it wasn't bad enough to really notice before, but the second you came back, it was reeking off you. I don't know what you did in there, but I ain't the type to trust some guy who comes back smelling like that."
At the confirmation, Subaru let out a short breath and closed his eyes.
The Witch's miasma—its thickening around his body had begun almost certainly right after he completed "Return by Death."
He had suspected it for a long time, but had unconsciously avoided arriving at an answer. Now, at last, he was acknowledging one piece of that puzzle.
——It was the Witch who had been granting
He didn't know why. There shouldn't have been any connection. And yet, there was a strange sense of understanding, of acceptance.
Like a puzzle he had been standing before for ages, knowing exactly what the finished picture should look like but hesitating to place the very last piece—now he had finally done it.
"What kind of damn fate do you have with me, anyway... Before I came to this world, my life had zero connection to the supernatural or anything of the sort. And even after getting here, I never met the famous Witch directly... Quite the opposite—within six hours of being summoned, I'd already died once."
The ability of "Return by Death" itself had been granted to Subaru from the moment he was summoned to this world.
If the Witch had a hand in that, then the summoning itself must also have been connected to the Witch. He had never once consciously pursued that answer until now—until— "So I finally can't look the other way anymore, huh..."
"What're you mumbling about? If you've got time to rack your brain over stuff that makes no sense, then haul ass to the cathedral and crash already. Don't go causing me trouble."
"...You're going to let me go? By your own logic, I'm a suspicious guy reeking of the Witch from head to toe. Late at night, nowhere around, just the two of us. This is the perfect setup for a secret meeting or a backstabbing."
"Ha. Short as my temper is, I ain't that far gone. ...Sure, biting your head off right now'd be easy enough, but then what? If the half-elf's companion drops dead, that'd cause even more of a mess—don't you think?"
Unable to read Garfiel's intentions, Subaru tilted his head. The other boy continued with a "But listen—"
"I ain't about to let you get any closer to the graveyard and make that stink any worse. Right now it's probably only someone with a nose like mine who's caught on... but this old hag here and the rest of the bunch, they could notice any time. And then there'd be even bigger problems."
"Even bigger problems..."
"Bet you can think of a one or two. This stench of yours didn't start today. And there are plenty of lowlifes out there who've picked up on your smell and are closing in."
At the growl in Garfiel's words, Subaru swallowed hard—because the implications hit far too close to home.
Seeing Subaru's reaction, Garfiel snorted and flicked a hand at him as though shooing a bug.
"So scram. Right now, I won't do a thing. If you keep your nose clean tomorrow and the day after, I won't bite either. But here's the deal—don't go near the graveyard, and don't go bothering me or the hag for no reason. Neither of us wants to deal with more unpleasantness, right?"
"Mutual non-interference, then. You're saying you'll really do nothing? How generous of you."
"You're alive because you stepped on Gringham's tail and got away with it. Before I change my mind, get lost. And for the record, I'd rather not have
Hearing the name of the girl he held dear, Garfiel made clear the resolve behind his choice. The hostility radiating from him was barely held back by extraordinary self-control—and Subaru could feel it.
There was still room for Subaru to argue, to protest, to push the debate further— ——But backing off here is the smart move, isn't it.
He made the call, let out a breath, and dropped his shoulders as he took a step back.
The moment Subaru signaled he had no intention of advancing, Garfiel's posture visibly relaxed. He closed one eye, exhaled a long breath through his nose, then plunked himself down right on the narrow path to the graveyard. Arms crossed, he looked up at Subaru from where he sat.
"That's right. Don't go doing anything stupid. —Starting today, I'm camping here until the 'Trial' is over. Tomorrow, the day after, and every day after that—morning, noon, and night—I ain't letting you past. You'd better remember that."
"...At least take a bath so Ram won't hate you."
"Do whatever you can to help
He closed his eyes, apparently dead serious about sleeping right here and now.
He looked wide open to attack. Subaru could retreat, take a massive detour through the forest, and reach the graveyard that way—it wasn't impossible— "I'll pass."
That, too, was probably part of his guard.
As long as Garfiel was visible, he had been content to stop Subaru with words alone. But if Subaru crossed the line that consideration allowed, Garfiel would show no mercy.
Subaru had no vision of winning against an opponent who could casually toss a dragon carriage and its driver,
"So the bill for skipping the tea party has come due, huh..."
He pressed a hand to his forehead, regretting the lost chance of having had that conversation with the Witch. There hadn't been any question he should have asked at that point, so it wasn't really something to blame himself for—but still.
"At least tonight's a dead end. I need to make some kind of move..."
He couldn't reach the graveyard without getting past Garfiel. And if he couldn't reach the graveyard, Emilia's only option would be to face the "Trial" head-on.
In Subaru's experience, there was no way she could overcome the "Trial" in the remaining three days. If he couldn't take some kind of action within that window— "The mansion gets attacked by Elsa. The chance to repel her—I'd let it slip right through my fingers."
Even if it meant relying on others, he had wanted to have that conversation with
And attempting the "Trial" without Echidna's input? Garfiel would block that as well.
Thinking it through to the end, Subaru realized just how tightly the situation had been jammed shut.
"Hey, hey, hey... Isn't this actually a pretty dire situation?"
Since he couldn't overpower Garfiel, the only way for Subaru to tackle the "Trial" was to talk circles around him—or find some other means to move him aside. But doing that alone was impossible— "And trying to recruit help... Ram and Otto aren't on my side in this situation."
Those two had weighed the relationship between the "Trial" and the Royal Selection and concluded that Emilia navigating this on her own was the best outcome. Of course, if they watched Emilia erode over another two days, they might change their minds— "But then the attack on the mansion will catch us off guard. Is there... any way to pull this off?"
There was a time gap between the point at which those around Emilia would start realizing the difficulty of the "Trial" and the crisis Subaru felt. If Subaru pushed too hard for his own participation in the "Trial," it would look like he didn't trust Emilia.
And just imagining how she would feel about that made his chest clench with pain. It wasn't that he didn't believe in her. Quite the opposite—he was certain that, given time, she would fulfill the role she had been given.
——Could he still say that, knowing the crushing burden she carried?
"———"
That inner whisper, so dark and so low, made Subaru stop in his tracks.
Sometimes he heard whispers like this. A voice from the darkest, shallowest part of himself, tittering from behind at the folly of reaching out for ideals.
"The 'Trial' will continue to consume her. Even so, she tries to press forward, wounded as she is, for the sake of those around her and her own wish. Right?"
——Did he truly believe she could overcome it just by pushing forward, ignoring her wounds?
Enduring the pain, holding back tears, swallowing the urge to cry—and if she just kept walking, the path would surely open, the wish would come true? Did he really believe that?
——There are wounds that need not be shouldered. Pasts that need not be faced. Sins that need not be atoned for.
"She feels it as a burden. She feels she has to do something about it. And that's why she's looking into the past and suffering for it, isn't it...?"
——But is now truly the time? Is it only that the timing is bad?
Should the past be faced? Is that really true?
Must committed sins be atoned for? Should redemption be forced?
It was a past she—Emilia—had rejected, insisting she didn't want it known. A past that, without this so-called "Trial," Subaru would never have dreamed of digging up.
Perhaps, given enough time, there would have come an opportunity to digest it and move beyond it.
But was now truly the moment? Was this the right time?
Could he take the answer he had arrived at under the compulsive drive to do something—could he stand by that answer with a clear conscience?
"At the very least, I'm glad I faced my own past. I've overcome it—even if it's nothing more than self-satisfaction, the fact that I'm standing here now is the answer."
——But that's because I was ready to face my past, wasn't it?
There had been a girl who affirmed him—told him she loved the self he had despised above all else.
Because of her, and thanks to her, Subaru had been able to show his pathetic side to his parents, to bare his ugly interior, and still hold his head up as he said goodbye.
——Was Emilia ready for that now?
He had touched on the weight of her past, but how much strength had his words and actions actually given her?
With his shallow outlook on life, his meager effort, and his love spoken without proof—how much had he really been able to support her?
"...What should I do for you, I wonder?"
He loved Emilia. He loved her. He wanted to keep loving her.
He wanted her to love him. To be loved by her. To be kept in her heart. That was what he wanted.
So he wanted to do things that would make her happy. He wanted to be of help. If she found something painful, something hard, something sad—he wanted to bear it in her place.
Even if he couldn't do that, even if he wasn't allowed—at the very least, he wanted to be her support.
——He wanted to do for Emilia what
With everything he had, like Rem who had loved him with her whole being, he wanted to support Emilia.
Only when he accomplished that, he believed, would he truly earn the right to keep the promise he had made to Rem. So right now, what Subaru needed to do was— "The time for you to stand. The resolve to accomplish something. All of it, everything that could make that possible... If I could somehow create that for you... I suppose that's it."
He spoke the words, clenched his fist, and reexamined what he had to do—then a breath laced with a smile escaped his lips.
What do you know—nothing he had to do had changed at all.
"I'll do everything in my power for her sake—when you put it into words, after all that agonizing, that's all it amounts to. Well, I do need to be aware of what I have to do."
First: the problems that needed solving, and the obstacles attached to them. And then: a plan to clear them—one brimming with surprise and ingenuity. He would set about drafting that now.
Time would not wait. It was limited. And he couldn't afford to rush to the wrong conclusion—he had already let far too many things slip by doing exactly that.
"Just because the situation looks grim doesn't mean things will improve on their own. The longer time passes, the worse things get—that's something I know all too well."
Leaving things to time and hoping they'd work themselves out was absolutely out of the question.
That was the harsh reality of this world, and precisely because it was, there was worth in struggling, worth in writhing, worth in standing and facing it head-on.
"The situation is worst-case. Time waits for no one. And as usual, nothing makes a damn bit of sense—but"
That was nothing new. That was the natural state of things for everyone. And the fact that he had been given the chance to try again—that alone meant he was in a far, far better position than before.
"I believe in Natsuki Subaru's courage—that it will save Emilia!"
Let's do this. Just one thing—let's give it everything we've got and break through.