The awakening began with darkness being torn open and the searing pain of daylight burning into her eyelids.
"...aru-ba?"
Physical sensations that should have been lost—warm blood flowing to fingertips and toes, the solid feeling of shattered lower limbs planted firmly on the ground.
The phenomenon of every lost function returning in a single blink flooded her freshly rebooted brain with information so mercilessly that it made her vision literally spin.
Before she knew it, the world that had been dominated by nothing but ringing in her ears was cluttered with the disordered noise of human activity.
People came and went along a dusty road, stepping around her rigid body without hesitation, casting irritated glances that pricked at her ragged heart.
"Hey, hey, brother! You listening?"
A rough voice laced with a tongue-click sounded close by, and her gaze drifted toward it. Standing right in front of her was a fearsome-looking man with a vertical scar on his face, scowling.
A full head taller, he traced the white scar lightly with a finger.
"Give me a break, brother. You're spacing out there."
"Eh, ah?"
"What's with that vacant answer? Well, whatever. More importantly, what are you gonna do?"
When only a raspy reply came, the man sighed, then pressed for a conclusion.
In his palm sat a small red fruit—a strikingly unfitting combination with his rough appearance, which undermined any sense of reality.
Staring at it dazedly, she remained silent. Her ability to perceive the situation had developed a critical flaw. But the scarred man had no reason to take that into consideration.
"Enough with the messing around, okay? I'm asking you if you want to buy linga or not. Answer properly."
He leaned forward, reaching across the counter. His outstretched arm grabbed her by the collar and yanked her forward. Her body lurched into a shelf, and the impact made the display of goods rattle and nearly topple. The man panicked.
"W-what the hell are you doing! Stand up properly. You just went all limp-legged on me..."
"My... legs?"
"You've got two fine legs from your waist down, don't you? You having hallucinations about losing your legs?"
The man tapped his temple and spun a finger, then pointed down toward her lower body. Following his finger, she looked down and saw her own legs, trembling faintly. They swayed so weakly they couldn't support her weight; she was barely standing, propped up against the counter with her upper body.
"Please knock off the bad jokes already. Things around here are crazy enough as it is without you acting weird on top of it."
Draped limply against the counter, she wore a blank expression as the exasperated man shook his head. Having an exchange like this out in the open would be a bad influence on the onlookers. His words carried that awareness, but her body didn't respond in the slightest.
She couldn't perceive reality as reality. There was a strange sense of alienation, like a thin membrane stretched over everything, and all information passed through her brain without registering.
What was she doing?
What had happened?
It felt like something had happened, but what was it?
What, what, what— Thoughts without direction found no exit, endlessly circling the narrow labyrinth of the skull and grinding away at her mind. If she could simply have eroded completely, or exhausted herself into oblivion, perhaps that would have been a relief.
But that sense of lonely dissolution— "—Subaru-kun?"
A girl's voice suddenly vibrated against her eardrums, sweeping it all away in an instant.
No sound came from her own mouth. As if pushed back, though gently, she raised her gaze with wide, transfixed eyes. Behind the imposing figure of the man standing across the counter, someone was straightening the shifted products on the shelves.
An apron dress in black and white, a white apron and white cap. A petite, slender frame moved busily, and when she noticed the gaze, a lovely face lit up before she turned around. Blue hair that reached her shoulders swayed with the motion, accentuating her cool, refreshing impression even further.
Tears spilled out.
"Hey—?"
"Subaru-kun?"
A sob escaped. Her vision blurred and kept fading.
The girl who should have been right there was becoming hazy, and terrified of losing that image, she rubbed her eyes desperately—roughly. But the girl kept receding, and the noise kept growing.
Before she knew it, her body had lost the counter's support and crumpled to the ground. No strength or will reached her feet. She lay flat on the road, tears streaming, gasping in ragged breaths.
No—those weren't breaths.
"Heh heh... heh heh, ha ha. Heh heh, ha ha ha ha..."
It was laughter.
The murmuring swelled, and she could feel the weight of attention accelerating toward her.
Someone was looking at her. Perceiving her. She wasn't alone. She wasn't isolated. Just knowing that—the self rolling on the ground like a rag was being validated.
"What's wrong, Subaru-kun? Are you okay? Stay with me—"
The girl scrambled around the counter and knelt down beside her. She felt herself being lifted— "Eh?"
Without warning, she pulled the girl who had approached undefended into a fierce embrace.
Dumbstruck, the girl received the hug. Her breathing, close and warm, was unbearably comforting, and she buried her nose in the girl's shoulder, clutching tighter still.
"Wha... um, Subaru-kun? Um..."
She was saying something. Each word, each syllable, each character woven from those lips—she could feel the truth of each one bringing salvation, second by second.
Holding on tightly, she refused to let go. The girl stirred faintly but quietly accepted the embrace without trying to pull away.
Feeling that warm body, that pulse of life, the presence of another person closer than anything— "Heh ha... uh heh ha, heh heh heh heh"
※※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ "Well, honestly, I think the only thing to say is we're out of options, nya..."
The striking figure with cat ears that twitched and rustled his chestnut hair looked down at Subaru lying on the bed, then directed a sympathetic gaze toward the girl standing beside it.
"Ferris-chan can only do something about physical injuries, you know? I can patch up the body, inside or out, but the heart... that's beyond what I can do, nya."
"No—thank you for everything you've done."
Ferris averted his eyes from the painful sight. Rem, still with her head bowed, didn't notice. She tilted her head slightly and turned her attention to the figure lying on the bed.
Lying there, attended to by both of them, was a black-haired youth—Subaru.
Though their gazes rested on him, his body offered no response to the attention.
He wasn't sleeping. His eyes were open, staring fixedly at the ceiling above with grave intensity. Occasionally, as if remembering something, a twisted smile would flicker across his face, and when it faded, he would suddenly break into tears. The unstable state persisted.
Rem didn't know the cause.
Up until this morning—no, even past noon, when they had been strolling through the lower districts of the capital—he had still been himself. There had been some strain in his manner, but he had been trying to act normal, and by treating him normally, Rem had believed they could build a semblance of routine.
And yet, his heart had shattered with almost no warning.
It didn't seem like anything had triggered it.
At the moment Subaru's demeanor changed, Regrettably, Rem hadn't been right beside him. But she had been helping in the shop and had overheard his conversation with the owner.
He had proposed to the owner that they buy linga to bring back to Crusch's mansion. The owner, never imagining it would end up in a great noble's estate, had casually agreed to the deal. During that very negotiation, Subaru's heart had been violently broken.
He had collapsed into the dusty street, staring at her with tears that seemed caught between joy and sorrow, laughing with spasmodic, wheezing sounds as though his lungs were seizing.
She had excused herself, and knowing it would be an imposition, hauled Subaru to Crusch's mansion, begging Ferris to examine him on the suspicion of some form of magical interference.
The results were not encouraging. If this was a problem beyond Ferris's reach, then no mage in the entire royal capital could hope to heal it.
His current state had nothing to do with magic. His mind had simply, suddenly lost its equilibrium.
"I really hate saying this, but what are you going to do? Without knowing the cause, there's no way to address it—I'm sorry to trouble you, Lord Ferris."
"Hmm, that's fine, actually. In fact, not thrashing around anymore means he's in a more convenient state for treatment, nya."
Ferris looked down at the nearly unresponsive, bedridden Subaru and continued, "But, but—"
"I'm wondering whether we should even keep treating him."
"...What do you mean?"
Rem looked up, turning away from Subaru's blank expression, and finally met Ferris's gaze. He held it, then prefaced his words with "Don't get angry—"
"Treating Subaru-kun's gate is meant to ensure he can live his daily life without problems going forward, right?"
"Yes."
"But he can't even live a normal life anymore, so what's the point of healing just his body, nya?"
"—! Subaru-kun is—"
"Don't say he's not done. Looking at him like this? Are you serious? He had some rough things happen, sure, but someone whose heart breaks this badly from that alone... even if he recovers, I don't think he'll amount to much, nya~"
As Rem bristled, Ferris held firm, his expression unyielding. The look he cast down at Subaru carried a clearly identifiable contempt.
For the person known as the water mage representing Lugunica—the one given the letter "Blue"—this attitude seemed far too cold.
Rem fell silent under that demeanor, and Ferris smiled wryly, shaking his head.
"I don't want you to misunderstand..."
"I don't dislike Subaru-kun personally, and I'm not saying this because I have some grudge against him, nya."
"But—"
"It's not about Subaru-kun as an individual, nya? Ferris-chan just purely hates people who lack the will to live."
He pouted his lips, cutting off Rem before she could object, and pointed at Subaru.
"What Ferris-chan can do with magic is limited to things like healing wounds. But even so, I use these hands for all sorts of people, busy as I am. Everyone's fighting to live, and helping them isn't a bad thing, right? I don't mind the gratitude, I build favor with the important people, and I can be of use to Crusch-sama, nya."
"———"
"But I don't want to spend my power healing the body of someone who won't even try to live. Someone like that will just waste their life afterwards anyway, right? Then it's better if it just ends. Hmm, it's already ended."
With that sharp pronouncement, Ferris turned his face away.
Behind that stubborn attitude, Rem could sense the sincerity with which Ferris regarded the lives she knew he had witnessed. His manner may have been frivolous, but this was a view of life and death forged through his own experience—a worldview firmly established within him.
And against someone with such conviction, it would have been pointless for an outsider like her to argue on emotion alone.
Rem could only look at Subaru, devastated by Ferris's words.
Subaru, unaware that he was the center of conversation, faintly let out a broken, halting laughter that scratched at the hearts of all who heard it.
Seeing his heart in pieces, Rem felt an unbearable emotion echoing through her own chest. But she held it in check, refusing to let it show.
It would have damaged Subaru's dignity, or perhaps tarnished Roswaal's authority—more than that, it would have been a betrayal of the feelings she herself had been harboring.
"I do think Ferris's opinion may be a touch harsh."
A voice rang out suddenly, clear and resonant, cutting through the awkward silence that had filled the room.
Rem, whose thoughts had sunk so deep she hadn't noticed the visitor, started and looked up. Ferris, who had heard the knock, wore a calm expression—no, the eyes he turned toward the visitor carried a quiet, smoldering intensity.
"Crusch-sama."
"I wouldn't go so far as to say weakness itself is a sin. Though I do agree that accepting one's weakness and choosing not to correct it—remaining complacent in that state—is a sin."
Crusch entered, raising a palm toward Rem as she scrambled to stand. Her long green hair swayed as she moved to the bedside and looked down at Subaru's face, still twisted in that ghastly grin.
"I see. This is indeed a grave situation. Do you know the cause?"
To Crusch's inquiry, Ferris shrugged and threw up his hands.
"Rem-chan says he collapsed suddenly. I've examined every part of his body, and there's no sign of any unusual magical interference, nya."
"Could it be the influence of curse arts from the north? It's unlikely, but there could have been interference from
"Both seem unlikely, nya~. The timing would be terrible for any such attack, and honestly, who would benefit from targeting Subaru-kun? Anyone involved already knows about his embarrassing little episodes. Besides, there's no trace of magical interference, curses included."
"Or perhaps—" Ferris tilted his head, enunciating each syllable deliberately, then sidled up to Crusch, who stood with her arms crossed. "Could Crusch-sama perhaps doubt Ferris-chan's abilities?"
"Absolutely not. I would never doubt your abilities, your character, or your loyalty. Even if you stabbed me in the front with a dagger, that conviction would never change."
"Oh, Crusch-sama, that's an unbelievable way to kill someone with words... I'm absolutely weak in the knees, nya."
Leaving Ferris to squirm, Crusch turned her gaze back to Rem, who had watched the exchange between the two in silence. Meeting that sharp look, Rem straightened her posture.
"Ferris has had his say. And if Ferris can't help, then no one in my household can treat Natsuki Subaru. I'm sorry we fell short."
"No—please. You've been more generous than I could ever express."
Rem bowed deeply in response to the mansion master's apology.
In truth, no amount of words or gratitude could adequately repay the kindness she had received.
She didn't believe Ferris had been negligent, nor did she think Crusch had made a biased judgment regarding
Water magic was something Rem had some familiarity with herself. She knew the height of Ferris's skill, and she knew that this change in Subaru was something it couldn't touch.
As for Crusch's character, though their acquaintance was only a few days old, her sincerity and rectitude were beyond question. Having inherited the duchy at a young age—as a woman no less—she possessed the ability, the sense of responsibility, and the qualities befitting a great noble. Having been given multiple opportunities to converse and exchange words with her, this much was clear.
In other words, neither of them bore any fault.
This situation was simply an unfortunate circumstance that could not have been avoided.
"—The
More than anyone, Rem knew it clearly: the stench of the Witch that surrounded Subaru had grown even stronger, and that was the cause.
※※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ The Witch's aura—the miasma—enveloping Subaru's entire body had grown even more concentrated.
Whether this was the direct cause of his collapse, she couldn't say. But that the aura had surged violently just before he fell—that much was certain.
Only Rem could sense this stench. No one else could.
She couldn't blame them for concluding that nothing could be done, and blaming others when she herself couldn't provide a fundamental solution was entirely contrary to her character.
The ability to sense the Witch's miasma was one of the very few ways Rem surpassed her sister.
Before
However, the ability to smell the Witch's miasma was something she had gained on the night her entire clan had been massacred.
She didn't know the reason. She believed her body had undergone some mutation—that night had refused to let her forget.
And she had never told anyone about this strange sense. She simply maintained heightened vigilance around those who radiated the stench.
A sense of instinctive revulsion, a prejudice at work.
Of course, that prejudice had once been thoroughly dispelled by the youth who had reeked of the Witch's miasma more strongly than anyone she had ever encountered.
And yet.
Even so.
The demon knew, with full clarity, that what this miasma brought was anything but good.
※※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ "Thank you for everything. On behalf of my master, I express our deepest gratitude for your generous hospitality."
Rem bowed deeply.
Before her stood Crusch and Ferris. The three of them meeting here, in the entrance hall of Crusch's mansion—this was a farewell.
"I'm sorry we couldn't do more. Normally, asking for compensation in a situation like this would be presumptuous—"
"No. I was the one who cut the arrangement short for my own reasons. Crusch-sama, you showed us the utmost consideration. Compensation was warranted, and it was rightfully paid."
Rem met Crusch's slightly averted gaze and lifted her head resolutely.
Hearing this, Crusch said "I'm sorry" once more, and left it at that. She understood that anything beyond this would be mere formality.
"Well, it feels like an incomplete conclusion, but I suppose there's nothing to be done. Take care, Rem-chan. As for Subaru-kun... I suppose 'take care' is the right thing to say, nya?"
It was Ferris who spoke next, stepping in for his lord.
Raising a finger and closing one eye, he gestured toward the rear, where Subaru stood leaning against the door, posture thoroughly disheveled.
His reactions were as sluggish as ever—whether he was even aware of their presence was doubtful. But if you took his hand, he would follow, and at least he could stand without collapsing. The only thing that couldn't be helped was his tendency to suddenly burst into laughter or tears.
"Regarding my household's discourtesy, I cannot offer enough apology. Thank you for treating him with such kindness. From the bottom of my heart."
"We had a contract and exchanged words to some degree. Treating him with contempt would have been impossible. I imagine the road ahead will be difficult for you."
"That is... something I have steeled myself for."
With Subaru swaying slightly beside her, a thin, vacant smile on his face, Rem gripped the hem of her apron and steeled her resolve.
She had not forgotten the words Subaru had once spoken to her. Again and again—dozens of times, hundreds of times—she had replayed them in her mind.
Therefore, she had to return to him the same measure of what he had given.
"It seems we won't be able to accept your offer. That is a pity."
These were the words Crusch spoke to Rem, her eyes closed in thought.
Though the sentence lacked a subject, Rem understood it referred to the private discussion that had passed between them.
Rem drew her chin in, then shook her head at Crusch, whose eyes were cast downward.
"This is entirely our shortcoming. It ended in an unfortunate result, but I pray for your continued success in the days ahead, Crusch-sama."
"Convey that to Emilia as well. Let us both fight in a way that brings no shame to our souls."
With that exchange alone, Rem understood that her role in this place had come to an end. The treatment of Subaru was cut short, and the instruction she had received from Roswaal— Neither could continue with Subaru in this state. She couldn't keep dragging an unguarded Subaru through what was essentially hostile territory.
"You're heading back to the mansion, but do you have a plan?"
"At least... if I can meet with Emilia-sama, perhaps something will change."
Holding back her frustration, Rem answered Ferris's question.
No matter how many times she called his name, no matter how many times she reached out, no matter how tenderly she treated him, Subaru never gave her the response she expected.
Even in his current state, he would occasionally utter words that carried meaning.
And those words were— "My name..."
"Hmm?"
"From time to time, he says it. My name, and Onee-sama's. And..."
While she was glad that her own name was among them, the fact that he showed no response to her efforts was equally painful.
But the name he murmured most frequently was— "If I can meet with Emilia-sama, perhaps something will change."
"But you parted on terrible terms, didn't you? And it's only been about three days, so maybe waiting a while would be... ah, that's not possible, is it?"
"I know it's not an ideal approach. But this is beyond what I can handle on my own judgment anymore. I need to return to receive instructions."
With all her strength, Rem spoke concern for her master in order to mask her true feelings.
She understood perfectly well what her heart truly wanted, and she used that as her justification.
And she was frustrated that she herself was not enough.
"Wilhelm has arrived."
Crusch, who had been gazing outward, narrowed her eyes.
Rem turned, following her gaze. Beyond the mansion's outer perimeter, past the iron gate, a dragon carriage had arrived, with a familiar elderly gentleman seated on the driver's seat.
"That's the last long-distance dragon carriage we have. I was nearly about to send it out on another errand."
"You got lucky, nya. If we push straight along the Rifaus Highway, we should reach the mansion before the date changes."
Watching the carriage, Rem narrowed her eyes against the rising sun.
It was nearly noon. If they pushed the dragon carriage to its limits, they could indeed reach the mansion in about half a day. Once they were close enough, she could use her sympathy ability to convey some of her intentions to her sister.
"Take care."
"Good luck."
Seeing them off, Rem bowed deeply one final time, then took Subaru's hand and departed the Karsten estate.
At the gate, she received the reins from Wilhelm, exchanged a few words, and climbed onto the driver's seat.
"Subaru-kun, come here."
"...Uh, huh?"
She pulled him up and seated Subaru beside her on the driver's seat. The two of them sitting together made it quite cramped, but with their bodies pressed close, she wrapped one arm around his waist and gripped the reins firmly with the other.
She would need to keep running for a long, long time in this state.
She worried about the toll it would take on Subaru, and once they reached the mansion, she would have to protect him. Surely Roswaal and the others would not welcome him.
She had to be on his side, if no one else was. She had to—because if not her, then— If not her, then— —As Rem deepened her resolve, she pulled the reins, and the earth dragon kicked off the ground into a run.
Slowly at first, the wheels gradually picked up speed.
The sensation through the reins was almost as if it mirrored the state of her own heart.