If she closed her eyes, even now she could recall the scene with perfect clarity.
White. A silver world, white from edge to edge.
Young
Why? her heart asked. But there was no answer.
She had no memories of what came before or after. Her consciousness was threadbare.
She pushed herself upright, rushed to the window, and looked outside. The familiar green forest village had been swallowed whole by a white ending, and was even now being slowly locked in ice.
For Emilia, seeing snow for the first time, she didn't even understand that this was the phenomenon known as "snow." All she knew was that instinct had seared its cold and its cruelty into her young mind in vivid, indelible strokes.
Without understanding any of it, Emilia choked on a sob and broke into a run, her face twisted.
The moment she burst from the ancient dwelling—a building carved out of a great tree—a cutting wind bit into her like a blade, and a freezing cold pressed against the soles of her feet as though stabbing them.
Almost immediately, the snow caught her legs and she tumbled face-first into the ground.
The cold sensation. White powder—snow crystals. For the first time, up close, she saw the grains of ice piling in white drifts, and terror bloomed inside her. Beautiful enough to make her tremble, yet terrifyingly, horribly cold.
Her clothing was little more than thin cloth wound around her body; it could not shut out the chill. The shuddering that ran from her core came from both the cold and the fear alike.
The snow leached the warmth from her body, and the white crystals threatened to steal her heart. Emilia let out a choked cry, brushed the snow clinging to every part of her, and ran again.
The fine powder fell ceaselessly from the sky. Gasping for breath, she lifted her chin and snow slipped past her lips, clinging to her throat. Tears traced down the profile of her face as she coughed and kept running.
She didn't know why she was crying.
She was simply afraid. She was terrified. Why was she all alone? Where had everyone gone? Everyone who was always kind, always smiling, always reaching out a hand—where had they gone?
She tried to picture their faces, and felt her thoughts snag and stall.
The faces of the villagers surfaced in her mind—and those faces, those smiles, were being smeared over by a black shadow, trying to rip them from her head entirely.
"———!"
She shook her head wildly, tears streaming, and kept running.
She mustn't think about them. If she thought about them, the black shadow would swallow her. Everyone precious would vanish from inside her head.
But if she didn't think about them, she would be all alone. Alone in a white world where she could see nothing, freezing—this was an unbearable terror for the young Emilia.
Young Emilia was powerless, ignorant, and could do nothing but flail within the white annihilation.
And yet the snow kept piling on, coiling around her struggling body as though mocking her, pulling her small frame deeper and deeper into the white end.
There was no one. She could meet no one. And before she could ever say "———" to anyone again— "——Ah!"
Lost in the white world, her numbed limbs refusing to move, Emilia collapsed to her knees and wailed like an infant.
From the knees down she had sunk into soft snow. It should have been cold, but she could no longer feel it. The skin they called "white as snow" had been burned raw and red by that very snow.
And so, as if fleeing from everything, Emilia hugged her head and sank into the snow.
The merciless snow kept falling, piling onto the small body of the young girl, and Emilia's tiny form vanished into the white—— "——Emilia!!"
A sharp voice split through the silence, calling her back from the endless sleep into which she had been sinking with closed eyes.
Lashes long as curtains of silk—her eyelids were pushed open, and Emilia lurched upright. The instant she did, her light body was hauled forcibly from the snow.
"——Ah"
"It's all right, Emilia. It's all right, it's all right. Thank goodness… I found you…"
She tried to raise her voice, but her throat, frozen to its limit, could manage only a rasping breath. Still, the person holding her seemed to understand Emilia's condition perfectly, and embraced the young girl tightly, voice trembling with pure relief at finding her safe.
Emilia rubbed her face against the short silver hair, sniffling her red nose, expressing with her whole body what words could not. In response to the boundless love directed at her, she showed through action that she felt the same.
To be held like this once more, to exchange words within these arms—in the white snow that had given little Emilia the despair that everything had ended, a sure and definite warmth now existed right before her eyes.
The short-haired woman held the trembling Emilia—shaking with joy and cold alike—and tightened her expression from one of relief to one of resolve. Glancing around, she broke into a run.
Then she exhaled a puff of white breath and pressed her lips to Emilia's ear.
"Emilia, listen. I know right now you don't understand anything, and I'm sure there are so many things worrying you… but it's all going to be all right. I'll make everything all right. Even if—hypothetically—I were separated from you here, I would absolutely never leave you all alone…"
Emilia heard the desperate voice but couldn't grasp what was being said. The mere possibility of being parted from this person was too terrifying, and with her numbed fingers she clutched at the woman's chest, eyes brimming with tears, shaking her head desperately.
For the young, innocent Emilia, appealing to the other's feelings was the only survival strategy she knew.
As long as she kept doing that, Emilia could remain the lovable Emilia she had always been for everyone. It had always been that way. So here too, and from now on—.
"——!"
"No, no, Emilia. It may have worked before, but it won't work anymore. You have to become strong, and wise, and courageous. If you don't, you won't be able to accept yourself, and you'll certainly reach a sad ending. That would be heartbreaking… for me, for everyone, and for your brother."
"——Uu"
She shook her head desperately.
And yet the person before her ruthlessly tore away Emilia's plea. She refused to let things stay as they were, rejecting little Emilia's clinging dependence right then and there.
Emilia couldn't believe it. The pain was unbearable.
It had always worked before. She'd been told to stop, and somehow she'd muddled through. So why was it no good this time?
At this moment—the most painful, the most wretched, the most frightening moment she had ever known—why did her old way of doing things suddenly not work? If there was a better way, why hadn't she known about it until now? ——Everyone became so hateful she couldn't stand it.
"——!"
"I'm sorry, Emilia. I'm so sorry. For never teaching you anything important, for hiding everything… for keeping you as a precious little princess all this time—please forgive me… forgive us…"
——I won't forgive you. I won't forgive you. I won't forgive you. I won't forgive you. I won't forgive you. I won't forgive you. I won't forgive you.
"The people around you, who cherished your smile—their kind lies—please, don't hate them…"
——I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them.
"———"
She hated lies. Lies were hateful. Lies were nothing but sorrow. Lies were the cause of everything that hadn't gone her way. Lies were what left Emilia all alone. So she hated lies.
She hated lies. She hated liars. Everyone was a——.
"Our precious Emilia… someday, surely, you will…"
"———"
Her voice, too weak to form words, trembled. She didn't want to hear anything more. No matter what she heard, nothing would change.
The biting wind, Emilia's own scream—these drowned out the last of the other's words from the world.
At Emilia's rejection, at her thrashing struggles within those arms, the silver-haired woman looked stricken—but as though casting off every emotion, she turned her face forward.
"——Ah"
And then, the true end arrived.
The person who had been running while holding Emilia stopped dead, having spotted something directly ahead.
A faint jostle made Emilia raise her head, and in her upward gaze she noticed that the face of the person holding her had gone more rigid than she had ever seen.
The emotions carved into that expression were complex—surprise and grief, rage and lamentation, aversion and yearning, and a measure of relief as well.
The wind, white and freezing, battered her cheeks with growing force.
A blizzard had risen to the point where simply keeping her eyes open was difficult. Overcome with terror, Emilia clapped her hands over her frozen ears and screamed.
And then—.
And then—.
——— ——— ———.
——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ———.
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ On the morning of the fifth day in the
"Subaru. —Where has Emilia-sama gone?"
"Huh?"
Subaru had been washing his face at the water trough and drying off with a wet cloth. When
It was just past early morning—roughly eight o'clock by the standards of his original world. Refugees and villagers alike had been drifting out of bed one after another, and the men were all lined up at the water trough washing off their sweat.
Into this wash area full of half-naked men Ram had strode with her characteristic poise and opened with the question: where was Emilia?
The presence of a woman in what the men considered a natural gathering spot sent a few of them scurrying away in embarrassment, but Subaru had no heart to tease them about it.
The meaning of Ram's words simply refused to compute.
"Emilia… did what?"
"Just what I said. I went to attend to Emilia-sama, and the room was completely empty. I assumed you'd taken her off somewhere for your morning stroll, but…"
"Empty? How did that even—look, I had a proper talk with Emilia once she was awake, then left the building, and came straight here—"
Still unable to conceal his shock from the exchange with Ram, Subaru mentally retraced the morning's events.
After the night she had asked him to hold her hand, morning came, and Emilia woke to find Subaru watching over her from beside the bed. She had offered him a quiet smile.
Even then, she had seemed uncharacteristically clear-headed for someone with low blood pressure. After glancing down at their still-joined hands, she spoke to Subaru in a soft voice, clearly wanting to continue last night's conversation.
"I want to sort everything out in my head first, then talk about it properly. Let me get Ram to help me get ready, and by the time I'm done, I should be able to have the conversation."
With that, she had ushered Subaru out of the room.
Subaru had felt the urge to press the matter, but considering Emilia's state of mind, pushing her would have been cruel. More than that, she had seemed so composed—being overly considerate on top of that might have backfired. That was his reasoning.
"So we parted ways, and I figured I'd leave the rest to you…"
"And so you left the building before Ram came to collect her. Right. —That was a gross oversight, Subaru."
"———"
There was no rebutting Ram's cold, cutting tone.
In truth, Subaru had let his guard down at Emilia's calm demeanor and failed to arrange a proper handoff to Ram. That was his fault. But he never imagined that Emilia of all people would end up in this situation.
"Maybe she just stepped out for a moment—"
"Are you saying Ram is careless enough to come here without checking the surroundings first? Because that's what it sounds like."
"No, that's not what I—but then why—"
"Do you really not understand?"
Ram's interrogation showed no mercy as Subaru faltered.
Her gaze, perpetually cold as ice, had grown even icier in this moment. It was the same look she'd given him last night during that exchange—bored, dismissive, piercing.
Disappointment and disillusionment floated clearly in those eyes, and Subaru lowered his own.
"You're telling me Emilia ran away?"
"What other interpretation is there? Or would you rather believe that opponents of the Sanctuary's liberation seized the chance when Subaru and Ram were both away from Emilia-sama's side, and carried out their plan this very morning? …Is that what you want to believe?"
"…It's not exactly impossible."
"If you're grasping at that, then you're beyond saving. Either way, the fact remains that Emilia-sama is absent. Even setting aside the possibility that she has no way to leave the Sanctuary—that is a problem."
Ram's stance was harsh, but she did take care to keep her voice low enough that others wouldn't hear. For her own part, she understood that if word got out that Emilia had abandoned the Trials and vanished, it could damage Roswaal's reputation. She had judged that this was a matter requiring careful handling.
"Emilia…"
Subaru lifted his head and whispered her name in a voice that wavered.
As Ram had said, even if Emilia tried to throw everything away and flee, the Sanctuary's barrier would never allow a half-elf to escape to the outside world.
Emilia was bound to the Sanctuary. She could run and run, but she would never get away.
She was not so foolish as to be unaware of that. But if, despite knowing that, she still wanted to flee—then she must have been driven into a corner that desperate.
"That's… my fault and
Puck's miscalculation—failing to imagine how devastating it would be for Emilia to have her bond with him severed.
And Subaru's mistake—judging Emilia's outward composure at face value, believing she had calmed down, and missing the signals she was sending.
If Emilia had indeed run away, it was the result of both of those failures compounding on each other.
"If Emilia-sama is hiding somewhere… Subaru, do you have any idea?"
"Wait. Don't jump to the conclusion that she ran. The bottom line is, anywhere in this Sanctuary, she can't exactly move around unnoticed. There's hardly anywhere she could be wandering around freely."
He gestured for Ram to hold off, and she relented with a sigh, giving a slight nod.
"I'll admit that's premature. But if that's the case, what do you propose? None of the men have spotted her—as Subaru's presence here makes obvious. Should we hope the women still in the Cathedral have seen her?"
"The villagers from Arlam would definitely call out to her if they spotted Emilia walking around alone. At worst, maybe one of the Sanctuary's residents saw something. We should follow up on those leads before jumping to conclusions."
As Subaru rattled off his plan of action at speed, he half-recognized that it was merely a postponement of the conclusion. Ram, who listened without interrupting, was surely thinking the same thing.
What Subaru and Ram shared in their understanding was this: Emilia had gone missing of her own volition, and the fact becoming widely known would be problematic.
Whether that concern was for Emilia's sake or Roswaal's, neither of them specified.
"If one of those turns up something quickly, it'll be a narrow escape. But we should prepare for the worst. You understand, Subaru."
"…I don't want to think about it, but yeah."
Ram's insistence was a warning: don't look away from the worst-case scenario.
If Emilia had fled to avoid the Trials, and the fact that she hadn't been found reached the ears of everyone in the Sanctuary—an irreparable wound would be inflicted.
The only way to prevent that was for Subaru and the others, who knew the truth, to act immediately.
"If we ask around and still can't find her…"
"Then we'll have to use every card we have and comb through the forest inch by inch."
"…That's not something you finish in a day or two."
Subaru raised his gaze to the trees encircling the Sanctuary and furrowed his brow.
Though the barrier kept the Sanctuary sealed off from the outside world, its area was still vast enough to hide a person many times over. And if Emilia had retreated into the forest, she had no reason to stay in any single spot.
Today, and tomorrow. From now until the deadline of the wager and the contract—roughly forty-eight hours.
Within that window, they had to find Emilia, get her to take on the Trials, and have her break through.
—Could he do it?
Of all people. After letting Emilia get to this point without ever noticing how badly her heart had been fraying—could he really be the one to give her the strength to face forward?
"…You overestimated me, didn't you, Puck…"
"The severing of the contract with the Great Spirit is probably connected too."
"If you mean the loss of her deepest emotional anchor, then yeah—it's related. But I never thought it would break her completely like this. Not her, and not me either."
There had been something on top of that—another weight, pressing her further into the corner.
Recalling Emilia's calm voice from last night and this morning, Subaru could think of no other explanation.
He had suspected something. He had been careful—he thought he'd verified everything before acting.
But what if—what if Emilia had already noticed?
"——Natsuki-san!"
The sharp call startled Subaru, whose face had gone rigid. He flinched involuntarily.
Looking up, he saw a gray-haired young man waving frantically and sprinting toward him from the village square.
It was Otto. He had stayed behind at the Cathedral that morning to help the villagers prepare breakfast, skipping the wash at the water trough entirely.
Otto arrived in front of Subaru with his hands braced on his knees, chest heaving.
"I—there are several things I need to report. If you count the details, it's actually quite a lot, but… to keep it brief, two major items. Good news and bad news."
"I'm curious about those too, but first—has Emilia shown her face at the Cathedral over on your side? Has anyone mentioned her?"
"…? No, I haven't seen Emilia-sama myself this morning. And I haven't heard anyone talking about her there either."
Otto frowned, clearly finding Subaru's unexpected question more urgent than the report he had brought. But he answered dutifully regardless, and the expressions on both Subaru and Ram's faces clouded over noticeably.
Otto seemed to sense something unsettling in their reactions, but apparently decided his own agenda took priority.
"So, good news and bad news—which do you prefer?"
"I'd rather not hear them back to back, but… let's go with the good news first."
If he heard the bad news first, he'd need time to think of countermeasures. On top of the existing worst-case scenario of Emilia's disappearance, layering on another blow and ending up paralyzed was something he wanted to avoid.
Otto crossed his arms and nodded at Subaru's choice.
"The good news: I've spoken with the refugees, just as we discussed with you. They've each been making quiet preparations, so we can go whenever you want today. I also asked them to be ready for sudden changes of plan, so even at the last minute is fine."
"…Good. Sorry about that. Ideally I should've been the one talking to everyone and securing their cooperation myself."
"Fortunately, I've been building rapport with them these past few days. If we're thinking about our relationship going forward, having this kind of opportunity has honestly been a blessing. Either way, preparations are proceeding without any issues."
His voice was steady as he reported back, but the expression on Otto's face—despite having accomplished something worth being proud of—was far from bright. Something must have happened to cloud even the good news he'd just delivered.
Under Subaru's silent gaze, Otto yielded and moved on to the second report—the bad news.
"So what's the bad news?"
"Just a little while ago, Garfiel burst into the Cathedral in a rage, screaming that he was looking for you, Natsuki-san."
"Looking for me…? What's that about? He shouldn't be causing trouble at this level yet this time around…"
This time, the final resolution waiting at the end of everything was the conversation with Garfiel. Precisely because of that, Subaru had been extremely cautious about any contact with him—both during his planning sessions with Otto and after the wager with Roswaal was struck. He had deliberately avoided crossing paths with Garfiel as much as possible.
Thanks to that, Subaru had managed to make it through to the morning of the decisive day without so much as a proper face-to-face encounter with Garfiel—but.
"If possible, I'd ideally like to deal with him only after I've settled things with Ryuzu…"
"That's exactly it."
At Subaru's words laying out his preferred order of operations, Otto suddenly raised a finger.
Subaru blinked. He had no idea what "that" referred to.
As the question marks continued to hover above Subaru's head, Otto spoke with a grim expression.
"Apparently Ryuzu has been missing since this morning. Garfiel is tearing the village apart looking for her. He seemed to want to discuss it with you specifically, Natsuki-san."