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Re:Zero − Starting Life in Another World · Bab 146

Chapter 3-69: "Fragments of Everyday Life"

13 Desember 2017 · 22 mnt baca · 4.417 kata

Judul ini belum diterjemahkan ke bahasa Anda — menampilkan versi English.

——The village was enveloped in an eerie atmosphere.

At the forefront knelt Julius, head bowed, and the subjugation team could be seen assembled in the center of the village. Everyone's injuries seemed minor at worst, so the ambush on the Witch Cult itself could be considered a success.

After that, the plan was for each team to enter the village and guide the evacuation— "What in the world is going on?"

Unable to grasp the situation, Subaru furrowed his brow, searching the scene before him for answers.

In the center of the village stood Julius and the subjugation team, and behind them, half-hidden, was what appeared to be a freshly arrived group of traveling merchants. The familiar faces—minus Otto—were lined up side by side, but their expressions were heavy with anxiety and confusion.

Facing them stood the villagers, also all familiar faces to Subaru. The children appeared to have been hidden indoors, and the ones staring down the knights were the adults, starting with the Youth Corps.

And at the head of those villagers, facing Julius head-on, was— "—!"

A lovely girl with short-cropped peach-pink hair, looking adorable in a frilly apron dress. Yet her expression was stern, and the way she stood with her arms crossed imperiously was vastly different from her sister.

Seeing a face identical to the girl who was such a large part of his emotional support, the dissonance hit Subaru all over again as a deep sense of wrongness.

"Subaru, you've come—"

"...Barusu, you're back."

At Subaru's loud call, the leaders of both groups reacted simultaneously.

Julius's face lit up with hope, while Ram's emotionless expression creased with displeasure.

Feeling a complicated mix toward Julius's welcoming mood and a wry resignation toward Ram's unfriendly attitude, Subaru dismounted from and hurried over.

"Wait, wait, wait—I can't tell what's going on, but just calm down. How about you leave this to me?"

"To Barusu? I can only say that's utterly ridiculous... Besides, what face do you even have coming back?"

"I'm glad your sharp tongue is still in top form. Don't think that rattles me."

Ram shot him a cold glare, but seeing Subaru deflect her barbs so effortlessly brought a faint flicker of surprise to her eyes. Finding that oddly refreshing, Subaru turned back to Julius and said, "Anyway—"

"I'd love to ask what happened, but first—let me confirm. The ambush went well, right?"

"Your signal went off without a hitch. Though a few of them had wandered outside the cave, so we couldn't avoid drawing swords entirely."

"No casualties on our side—good. Our end went well too. The Sin Archbishop is in Wilhelm-san's custody."

When Subaru pointed, Wilhelm, positioned slightly apart from the commotion, raised a hand. At his feet lay Petelgeuse, bound in a straw mat, and Wilhelm's hand rested constantly on his sword hilt, ready to strike at a moment's notice.

Surveying the scene, Julius let out a sigh of relief and said, "Impressive as always. The preliminary phase of the operation must be called a success. However, a problem has arisen."

"Looks that way. I don't really know the details, though..."

The back of Subaru's head prickled with the stares of two people whispering conspiratorially. He turned toward their source and found Ram glaring at him with arms crossed, eyes practically burning holes through him.

Subaru exhaled and shrugged with an exasperated expression.

"We haven't seen each other in days—don't give me the cold shoulder. I'm not asking for a hug or anything, but is it too much to expect a warm word or two?"

"You'd prefer insults so sharp they'd make your blood boil? I won't indulge your masochistic tendencies, Barusu. What is this group supposed to be?"

"What do you mean 'what'? I wrote that letter with everything I had! If the merchants are here, that means the envoy from the capital should've arrived too—"

"Subaru, that's the problem."

At Ram's pursuit, Subaru tilted his head. Behind him, Julius reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder to present the issue. But Subaru couldn't quite grasp its meaning.

"A letter... A personal letter. Yes, the envoy did bring one. A personal letter, he said."

Ram's voice came low and quiet as she slipped a hand inside her maid uniform.

Subaru recognized that flat intonation—he'd heard it before. It was a prelude to the fury Ram could barely contain.

"A personal letter delivered with great ceremony by an important envoy—only to be a blank page. What a delightful little joke. May I ask what this is supposed to mean, Barusu?"

The letter she thrust toward him was unfurled before Subaru's eyes.

For a moment, his vision went blurry as he failed to process it, then he took a step back in shock. The letter in Ram's hand—the personal letter's contents—were completely, utterly blank.

"Blank?! Why?! That can't be right... because—!"

"I was told it contained grave news, so I opened it to find this. On top of that, mysterious strangers waltzed into the village, and to make matters worse, an armed group shows up. If anything, it would be strange not to be on guard."

"No, that's not—! These people are with Crusch-san's group, and this is the mercenaries from Anastasia-san's camp... But first of all, the contents of this letter—"

"Su—ba—ru— ♪"

Ram snatched the letter from Subaru's hand as if to tear it away, staring at the blank page as though trying to burn a hole through it. Subaru opened his mouth to offer a confused excuse, but was cut off by a finger that suddenly appeared from behind.

Wincing from the pain of his ear being tugged, he turned to find Felix grinning cat-like right in his face. Felix flicked Subaru's nose with the hand opposite the one pinching his ear.

"Ow!"

"Calm down, take a deep breath, and let's organize what needs to be said, nya. There's no rush—things are mostly going smoothly, so just take it easy, okay?"

"I can't exactly calm down when—"

"Want me to stick my tongue in your mouth and force you to calm down?"

"I'm calm! I'm extremely calm right now! My blood just ran cold—cooling down complete!"

Before those mischievous eyes could draw any closer, Subaru straightened his spine and extracted himself from the situation. He retreated at triple-axel distance, then cast his gaze down at the letter in his hand again.

It looked identical to the letter he'd agonized over with back at Crusch's mansion, meant for the envoy Anastasia had requested before leaving the capital.

Though, the contents had been entirely removed—or rather, swapped out.

"So the failure to convey advance intelligence is what caused this mess. Then when Julius was loudly announcing his name earlier—"

"He got carried away and nearly caused a clash. He had no choice but to reveal his name to try to defuse the situation. Your arrival rendered that concern moot, though."

Julius stroked his violet hair and let out a weary sigh. "However—"

"My identity as Julius, Knight of the Royal Guard, has now been revealed to everyone."

"For the record, everyone who knows your face and name already knew that. —Be that as it may, I'm grateful you stopped what was about to become a riot."

"What? It's simply a knight's duty."

Julius smiled, unbothered, at Subaru's gratitude—delivered with eyes averted. Feeling vaguely irritated by that attitude, Subaru cleared his throat and looked at Ram again.

Having had her conversation interrupted multiple times already, the sharpness of Ram's gaze had increased by a few shades from where it started. Sensing a growing premonition that he'd soon be sliced physically in some way, Subaru pressed on: "The letter being blank was our screw-up—lots of things went wrong on our end. The main points are two: the Witch Cult is lurking, targeting the mansion, and we've arranged evacuation with the help of the traveling merchants. We've secured dragon carriages for the villagers to escape to safety."

"And these gentlemen with their alarming equipment are supposed to be traveling merchants?"

"Well... no, they're—"

Ram maintained her hostile posture, and Subaru stammered in response. But the answer to her last question came not from him— "We are, on this occasion, a vanguard reinforcement dispatched in advance of the alliance formed between Duke and Lady ."

Stepping forward, a chestnut-haired figure knelt. The courteous, deferential bearing was beyond reproach, and each fluid movement spoke of thorough education.

The knight—complete with cat ears atop her head and dressed in feminine attire—presented a polished elegance that would be impossible to imagine from her usual airheaded, mischievous demeanor.

Felix looked up at Ram, who stood rigidly, and spoke in a quiet voice: "My name is Felix Argaile. First Knight of Duke Crusch Karsten, and the official representative for this alliance. I cannot sufficiently apologize for the failures in our communication, but... I would ask that we prioritize Barusu-sama's account for now."

"...An alliance."

Maintaining his courteous manner, Felix watched as Ram murmured the word softly and glanced toward Subaru. She touched her thin lips, frowned deeply, and said: "Whatever your role was back in the capital, it seems you've managed to carry it out."

"If you'd put that in simpler terms, I wouldn't have had to struggle so much, you know."

Without boasting about his accomplishments, Subaru offered that honest feedback. Roswaal's secret instructions had been absurdly cryptic. He'd died three times, received a flood of hints from Rem, and only then finally grasped the thread. It was practically a first-kill scenario.

"So, to summarize, I've largely fulfilled my role in the capital. Now I'd like to fulfill my purpose for coming back and greet tomorrow without a hitch. That said, I need to hurry the evacuation along—"

"...Ram was aware that an ominous presence lurked in the forest. Since it didn't fall under my clairvoyance's direct reach, it was simply unpleasant. Yes—the Witch Cult."

Ram's clairvoyance worked by synchronizing with the senses of those whose wavelength matched her own, hopping from one pair of eyes to the next. If her words were true, not a single Witch Cult member had a wavelength compatible with hers. Whether to celebrate or lament that was hard to say—the pros and cons muddled together.

"We've cut down roughly eighty percent. Their commander has been captured as well."

Subaru reported the current results to the still-displeased Ram. Upon hearing this, Ram blinked in genuine surprise for the first time this encounter.

"That would put them near total annihilation, wouldn't it?"

"With these guys, one spotted means thirty more lurking—that's the rule. They won't be truly safe until every last one is hunted down. That's why evacuation is absolutely essential."

"Holding up in the mansion would be a poor strategy?"

"They'll burn it down without a second thought—those bastards. If you don't want our mansion full of memories set aflame, it's a lot smarter to just run."

Even as he said it, Subaru felt a chill at his own analogy. Ram visibly recoiled—apparently the mention of 'burning' had struck a nerve. Perhaps she had bad memories involving fire. Something Rem had once said flickered through his mind, but he couldn't quite grasp it.

In any case, "There's enough room on the carriages for the villagers and the three at the mansion. Roswaal isn't here, right?"

"No. Lord Roswaal is currently at the ... with Garfiel. Ram has been ordered to await Lady Emilia's decision here."

"Emilia-tan, huh..."

At Ram's answer, Subaru cast his gaze around, searching for the silver-haired girl. But it seemed she hadn't descended to the village yet—there was no sign of her.

Ram let out a soft sigh at his searching.

"Lady Emilia is resting at the mansion. —She's had to endure too much, for too long."

"Endure?"

"You'll understand soon enough, Barusu."

Subaru frowned at Ram's cryptic words, but she offered nothing more. Judging that he'd get nowhere with that approach, he decided to at least round up the current gathering and load them onto the dragon carriages. Clapping his hands for attention, he addressed the crowd: "Attention, everyone! Good morning—it's been a while! My name is ! It's been only... about a week? I don't want to sound like I was forgotten in that time, but—I'm back!"

Raising his voice, Subaru called out. The villagers, who had been watching from a distance, began cautiously peeking in. When they recognized the familiar figure, their guarded expressions gradually softened into something closer to relief.

As the severity of their gazes eased, Subaru raised both hands high so everyone could see, spun around on the spot, and continued: "Now, I know this is sudden, but hear me out—it's a simple request. Think of it as a little picnic. I've rented the dragon carriages and reserved seats for everyone. The chairs are hard, but the ride is smooth—special-grade suspension. Form groups with your friends and climb aboard. Half a day, maybe a full day—just go have fun for a bit, and you'd be doing me a huge favor."

He'd said 'form groups with whoever you like'—and dug right into his own old wounds. If that dynamic started, he'd invariably get dumped into the leftover group, where he'd still stick out. That was the kind of social life Subaru had.

As those bitter memories surfaced, the villagers exchanged glances at his appeal— "Why do we even have to run away like this?"

The question came hesitantly from the man with the bowl cut—the representative of the Youth Corps. He kept touching the hilt of the sword he carried as he looked at Subaru: "I'm trying to stay positive about this, but you're saying we flee, right? Abandon the village... Why should we have to do that?"

"This is just who I am, so don't go looking for some hidden agenda, but there's no need to think of it as abandoning the village. Seriously, just give me half a day—"

"—It's the Witch Cult, isn't it?"

The bowl-cut青年 murmured, and a ripple of agitation ran through the village.

Not just the villagers—the traveling merchants, who had been watching to see which way the discussion would go, were equally affected. Their expressions tightened, lips trembling: "It really is the Witch Cult..."

"How terrifying... why are such dangerous people here..."

"It's obvious! Isn't it obvious?! Dammit—the lord, what has he done..."

"Why did he have to involve a half-elf... a half-elf of all people..."

"Hey, hold on—"

Subaru held out his palm toward the villagers' murmuring—quiet but unmistakably vibrating the air.

Tasting the dry, tight sensation in the back of his throat, Subaru walked toward the voice he'd just heard. He faced one of the thinner young men.

"What did you just say?"

"Well, I didn't say anything wrong, did I? In fact, the fact that they're coming here—"

"I asked what you just said!"

Subaru's sharp eyes bore into the man as he practically lunged forward, shouting.

Instantly, the man who'd been yelled at looked around in pitiful panic, turning his head to seek help from those nearby. But everyone had averted their gaze—nobody would meet his eyes.

Abandoned by his cold-hearted neighbors, the man resigned himself and stared back at Subaru: "Y-You get involved with a half-elf, and the Witch Cult goes on a rampage. Everyone knows that—even kids know that story. But the lord had to go and publicly endorse a silver-haired half-elf to the king...!"

"What does that have to do with any of this?"

"Don't you get it?! If word spreads that the lord is openly supporting a half-elf, it'll provoke the Witch Cult! And you, of all people—that's exactly why you're here like this! So if that's the case—"

"—Don't you dare say something like 'it would've been better if she'd never existed in the first place'?"

The young man, swept up in momentum, had been about to say something unforgivable. But Subaru's words were faster, cutting him off.

Subaru pressed his palm against the man's chest, pushing him back, then slowly looked around the crowd. Everyone wore the same fear in their eyes.

Deliberately, Subaru let out a great exaggerated sigh: "Who exactly is putting this village in danger?"

Silence.

"Who exactly committed atrocities so terrible that people are terrified of the name ''?"

Silence.

"Shouldn't all of you be looking at a different target? I get that it's easier to throw your frustration at someone you know is standing right there, rather than some unknown menace—I'm one to talk, I know. But still—"

Dissatisfaction always flowed downward.

Everyone knew it was easier to direct their resentment at someone weaker. Nobody understood that better than Subaru, the self-proclaimed weakest of the weak.

Even so—he wanted to believe this, even if he knew it was self-indulgent: "I know I'm the worst. That's why I want to believe everyone else is better than me in some way. I know it's a childish wish, but please—don't make me think this was all for nothing."

He wanted to protect Emilia at the mansion, protect Ram, protect . And just as strongly, he wanted to protect the people of this village—these people who had treated him with warmth, even if the time they'd shared was brief. He was growing to care about them, and he didn't want to betray that feeling.

With that selfish wish in his heart, Subaru bowed his head.

"Whether Roswaal did something or whatever—that doesn't matter right now. The half-elf at the mansion and whatever—that can wait. Right now, this village is in danger. So I want everyone to evacuate. I've prepared everything for it."

From the young man's attitude alone, Subaru could sense the deep-rooted prejudice against half-elves.

He'd known about it on a surface level, but now—learning that the people he knew and was close to were directing it at someone dear—that surface knowledge became painfully real.

Had Emilia been enduring this contempt all along?

While Subaru's head was bowed, someone suddenly stepped up beside him.

Julius, in his resplendent Royal Guard uniform, stood tall. He took his place next to Subaru and bent his tall frame in a proper bow: "I humbly ask that you listen. I swear upon the pride of dragons and knights that your safety will be guaranteed. Please—lend your ears to his words now."

A silence— 'What an unnecessary meddler,' 'What a pretentious thing to say'—all manner of thoughts flickered through Subaru's mind. But what genuinely filled his chest was gratitude toward Julius.

The fact that he was having such feelings toward that handsome man's profile embarrassed him, so Subaru kept his head lowered and averted his gaze from Julius beside him: "I'm not gonna thank you or anything."

"Hah. —That's exactly what I wanted to hear."

Yep, deep down, this guy was the worst.

※※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ "Walking through the mansion with you like this, Barusu—it feels like it's been so long. Even though barely a week has passed."

"I completely agree. Though the sentiment behind that probably differs quite a bit."

"Oh? You think so?"

"I know so."

Strolling side by side down the corridors of Roswaal Mansion—their old home—Subaru exchanged idle banter with Ram.

Come to think of it, in his repeated loops, he'd only made it to Roswaal Mansion and explored its interior twice. The first time, the estate had been utterly devoid of any sign of life— "—Ram."

"Did you call?"

"No, I just... thought about Ram. The Ram standing right here is fine as is."

"That incomprehensible way you speak is even more irritating after a long time away."

Ram turned up her nose with a pristine expression, letting Subaru's joke slide.

She walked ahead in her maid uniform—a image that, in the first world, Subaru had discovered as a corpse on a bed. The only comfort at the time had been that her death hadn't been a messy one.

In the second world, the mansion had crumbled due to 's rapid growth. And in the third world—the mere thought of it sent a chill down his spine.

"Barusu, you've walked past it."

"Sorry, sorry... Wait, this is—"

Lost in thought, Subaru had failed to notice Ram stop, and had walked past. He doubled back and looked at the door. Ram had led him to a guest room— "This is Emilia-tan's room, isn't it?"

"Since only Ram, Lady Emilia, and Lady Beatrice are in the mansion now, they've gathered in the central wing. Especially after last night—she was quite exhausted."

Recalling what Ram had told him, Subaru's gaze dropped slightly at the thought of Emilia's hardship.

After returning to the mansion, Ram had given him a rough account of what Emilia had been doing. After Roswaal came back from the capital and immediately left to visit the powerful figures in his network, Emilia had thrown herself into her studies without even sleeping.

"She was immersed as though possessed—as though something unpleasant had happened in the capital, and she was trying to forget it."

"Ugh..."

"It was as though something unpleasant had happened with a man in the capital, and she was trying to forget about that man."

"Don't throw that weird little phrase in there! I can't... fully deny it..."

As Subaru shrank back, Ram sighed. Then she shook her head with a look of exasperation, gesturing toward the room's door: "Once Ram noticed the disturbance in the forest through clairvoyance and reported it, she must have been even more exhausted. Given the attitude of those villagers just now—you can understand, can't you?"

"I can sort of imagine it, but I don't really want to put it into words. —Rejection?"

"Rejection? My, what a generous interpretation, Barusu."

Ram scoffed at his words, then immediately erased her expression. After a beat of silence, she continued in a tired voice: "—Denial. If you're rejected, there's still the possibility of extending a hand. Having your hand slapped away means you were touched at all. But denial—what about that?"

"......"

"If even the attempt to reach out is met with revulsion, how could you possibly close the distance?"

At Ram's probing words, Subaru swallowed and couldn't return an answer.

It didn't seem like Ram had expected one, either. She exhaled to signal time was up, then added, "I was being cruel, wasn't I?": "Noticing the ominous presence in the forest, Lady Emilia came down to the village to evacuate the people to the mansion. And she was denied. You know as well as Barusu that she's not the type to simply retreat when refused."

"But I also know she's not a girl who won't get hurt even if she's treated like she has nothing to offer."

The irritation leaked past his guard and onto his tongue. Subaru glared out the corridor window, narrowing his eyes at the village in the distance.

It wasn't that these people were uniquely narrow-minded or heartless.

This was the ordinary reaction—the treatment Emilia had always received. Was it really so arrogant to simply wish for that to change?

"Then does that mean this feeling I have—this rage at the unfairness of the world—is that 'arrogance' too?"

Throwing those words behind him, Subaru closed his eyes once, then strode toward the door as if shaking something off.

He raised his face, wiped away the negative emotions, and tried—at least for this moment—to forget them. Ram, respecting his resolve, made no further comment on it.

"Lady Emilia, are you awake?"

Two small, firm knocks echoed through the corridor's cold morning air.

After Ram's call and the knocks, a few seconds of silence, and then— "...Ram? Yes, I'm awake."

A voice like a silver bell—so beautiful it was mesmerizing—rang lightly in Subaru's ears.

Its gentle, noble clarity, its brave composure, made Subaru momentarily forget the anxiety that had been churning inside him.

The tangle of worries—what would he say to her, what words should he use—all of it vanished in that instant.

He'd come back, after all, to hear this voice. To see her.

"Pardon me, Lady Emilia. —Barusu has returned."

Ram pushed the door open, bowed gracefully, and reported the return of a retainer to her temporary mistress.

Following behind the small figure who led the way inside, Subaru stepped across the threshold with clumsy, halting steps, forgetting even to breathe— "Huh, Suba—?"

"H-It's been—"

It wasn't something he'd prepared, but he'd wanted to at least greet their reunion with a smile. So Subaru did his best to offer a gentle one, raising his hand slightly, and focused on Emilia as she turned toward him— —and the blinding white of her bare skin, caught mid-change, burned itself into his eyes. Emilia's back, exposed and luminous, was seared into his vision.

"Oh my, how rude."

With that casual remark, Ram stuck out her tongue and flicked both frozen figures on the head. Her carefree little gesture, however, was the only comedy either of them could process.

They stared at each other in silence. Subaru's gaze traced from Emilia's face, down her exposed back, along her slender, elongated legs, to the tips of her bare toes— And the moment the grin beneath his nose stretched even wider— "To think you'd do such a thing to an unmarried young lady—"

A gray kitten that had suddenly descended before his eyes released magical energy into Subaru's grinning, frozen face. With no recourse, Subaru's body was blown backward into the corridor. Ram scrambled after him, and just before he slammed into the window— "If the window broke, that would be a disaster."

"Fwah!?"

At the last possible instant, the window opened, and Subaru's body tumbled outside with its momentum. Fortunately, it was the first floor, so he avoided a fatal fall—but he skidded across the dewy grass face-first, rolled, and finally came to a stop in a flower bed.

Soil in his mouth, a fertilizer-rich mud wall before his eyes. His clothes were bloodstained, overwritten with sand, and his permanent scowl looked worse than ever.

"Puck... too far. Oh—Subaru, are you okay?!"

From the mansion window, far away now, the worried voice of his beloved girl reached him. For some reason, Subaru let out a small laugh.

Nothing had been resolved yet. Nothing was finished. And yet—the fragments of the days he'd wanted to live through one more time seemed to shimmer with a quiet brilliance.

Until Ram came to help him up, her hand extended as though reaching for something grotesque, Subaru kept laughing softly, softly, chuckling quietly to himself the whole time.

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