——Even though things had been wrapped up, fully restoring the atmosphere in the parlor was impossible.
Having heard
Considering the damage Subaru and the others had suffered, it was an utterly selfish way to behave.
In the end, each faction quickly cleaned up the meal in the parlor, and without any chance to resume a lively conversation, the dinner party dissolved into departure.
The shock and the sting of what had happened lingered heavily on everyone, and the toll on both Reinhard and Wilhelm was so deep that outsiders could never have fathomed it.
Still, the fact that neither of them let it show on their faces spoke to just how formidable their spirits were.
Of course, the reconciliation between grandfather and grandson — one that had been on the verge of happening — was postponed yet again, and for Subaru, it left a lingering, agonizing regret that would not fade easily.
"I'm truly glad Garfiel wasn't there."
Those were Otto's parting words after the dinner party concluded and he set off for the Musel company.
He was absolutely right. If Garfiel and the other hot-blooded types had been present at that dinner party, it would have led to a catastrophic situation. It was easy to imagine Garfiel leaping at Heinkel, and a bloody mess ensuing.
Only the rational members had remained in the parlor. —Or perhaps even that was something that had played out in the palm of Priscilla's hand.
"As if she could be that omnipotent. It was just coincidence. Nothing more."
It was nothing more than Priscilla's so-called good luck working in her favor, for once, with the wind at her back.
It was, frankly, a way of thinking that amounted to searching for the best option among the absolute worst — but as a silver lining in an otherwise dire situation, he had to acknowledge that much, or his guts would twist themselves into knots.
The emotional wounds
Even Felt had managed to behave rationally — and yet Subaru was the one who'd become the most emotional of all. He felt apologetic toward the two of them, who had needed to be mindful of both enemies and allies alike.
Emilia and the others had returned to their rooms for a brief rest before the promised stroll.
Subaru was trying to use this free time to burn off his restless energy by walking. His feet struck the floorboards harder than usual, as if driven by something beyond his control.
The creak beneath his soles felt like a reflection of his own heart's creaking.
Mulling over that thought, Subaru deliberately pressed down harder to feel that creak more acutely. And then— "You shouldn't take it out on the floor like that, Subaru. You'll be troubling the inn's staff."
Subaru, who had been glaring at his own feet, raised his head at the voice that came from his side.
He found that he had somehow wandered to the veranda in front of the garden. There, standing in the garden and letting the breeze wash over him, was Julius, watching Subaru put the floorboards through their paces.
His slightly wavy purple hair was tucked back by one hand, and the way he stood receiving the cool wind was almost painterly — irritatingly so.
Subaru could never approach Julius without some degree of spite, so he clicked his tongue at the man's pretty-boy looks before settling down onto the veranda.
"Weren't you with Emilia-sama and Beatrice-sama?"
"It's obvious, isn't it? They're not kids. They're at an age where they want some private time, and even I have the decency to respect that. Besides, I've got a proper date planned with the two of them."
"I didn't quite catch some of those words, but I think I've grasped the gist. It seems you've even learned to be considerate of others."
"Ggh, you...!"
Despite being the one who'd started the exchange, Subaru found himself on the defensive first, bristling at Julius's manner of speaking. But that irritation dissipated the moment he saw Julius's expression.
The knight shook his head slightly and said: "I'm sorry. If you were truly the kind of man who couldn't care about others, you never would have raised your voice so fiercely against the Vice-Commander back there. ...In fact, I should be the one thanking you."
"I didn't do anything worth thanking. I was just pissed off because I couldn't stand the guy. Everyone else was being calm and collected, and I looked like an idiot."
"That's not true at all. The reason everyone else was able to stay calm was precisely because you showed such rash behavior. I include myself in that. Your impulsiveness has its uses on occasion."
"You're not secretly trying to compliment me or something, are you?"
Subaru scowled at the backhanded phrasing.
Julius's words always carried a subtle layer of sarcasm where Subaru was concerned. It was a two-way street, so Subaru couldn't exactly complain — but he still couldn't take the praise at face value.
"I know. You need to stay calmer, more composed. That's what it means to be a knight. Even after becoming a knight, I'm aware I still lack composure. It was written on every report card I got in elementary school."
"Yes, you're right. If we're talking about demanding knightly conduct, then your behavior was certainly not something to be praised. However—"
Julius suddenly cut himself off in front of the sulking Subaru.
Then, watching what Julius did next, Subaru's eyes went wide in astonishment.
"What are you doing?"
"Just what it looks like."
"If that's what it looks like, then it looks like you're bowing to me."
In front of Subaru, Julius had bent at the waist and lowered his head.
It was not a knight's salute. It was not a noble's bow either. What lay before him was a pure, unguarded bow — one that discarded all etiquette and rank. It was completely unlike Julius.
"I'm grateful to you. I thank you. For standing in for me and showing your righteous indignation at that place — I am grateful to you."
"...I don't understand what you mean."
"If we value what it means to be a knight, then we are expected to behave as knights in every situation. Even if a friend is being humiliated, even if they are subjected to shame that is unforgivable as a human being — we must not act on our emotions. But you... you did not hold back."
Still with his head bowed, Julius continued to voice his gratitude for Subaru's rashness.
Subaru, faced with this utterly unexpected response, could only stand there in bewilderment.
"Caught between being a knight and being myself, I suppressed my anger out of instinct. But watching you flare up with such fury, I felt ashamed of myself. That is why I want to thank you."
"You're thanking me for getting angry on your behalf?"
"———"
When Subaru spoke in a tone that suggested he finally understood, Julius at last raised his head.
Having bared his heart, a certain brightness had surfaced in his eyes — but Subaru twisted his lips into a smirk when he saw it.
"Give me a break. Seriously, stop being so dramatic."
"...Stop being dramatic, you say."
"Obviously. Since when did getting angry become something I did on your behalf? I was mad because I was pissed off. I wasn't about to punch that mustached old man because I was doing it for someone else. You think I'm capable of that kind of tender rage? Give me some credit."
Subaru was genuinely exasperated at whatever Julius was deluding himself with.
Subaru wasn't even confident that his anger had been noble enough to be called righteous indignation. Reinhard and Wilhelm's feelings were something only the two of them could understand.
Subaru, as an outsider, had simply imagined what it must be like, and charged in with nostrils flaring because he felt that image had been trampled on. His anger was for no one else — it was his own.
"If you were so pissed off, you could've gotten angry too, couldn't you? I was the only one there, so you could play it cool — but if you'd joined in, that old man would've been even more scared and ran off."
"I am, nominally, the Vice-Commander of the Royal Guard. It's not exactly easy to show such disrespect to someone who is, at least on paper, my direct superior."
"He's not your superior anymore! Besides, you even said 'nominally' yourself, didn't you? Stop thinking so rigidly. While you're busy fretting over being knightly this and knightly that, you'll end up wearing that armor on the inside too."
"———"
As Julius fell silent, Subaru propped his chin on his hand with an exaggerated sigh.
What a stupid argument. Because he couldn't accept the gratitude at face value, Subaru was lashing out at Julius instead.
Thinking that it had all started with Heinkel made Subaru even angrier.
"'Armor on the inside,' hm. ...How painfully accurate."
"Even I think that was a pretty cool line, so just let it go. It was a throwaway remark."
"No, I'll engrave it into my heart. The thought that there are things I can learn from you — that actually feels rather pleasant. It's something I couldn't have imagined a year ago."
"For the record, I still occasionally have nightmares about it."
Dreams of facing Julius on the training ground and being beaten senseless with a wooden sword — those still came to him.
The physical pain from those encounters was hard enough to recall, but what hurt even more was that his memory faithfully reproduced every ounce of mental anguish without holding anything back. His useless photographic memory had seared those moments into perfect clarity, and like a movie reel, it held a late-night screening every single night.
Of course, it wasn't only his duel with Julius that played on that screen — but among the countless events that scarred Subaru's psyche on par with one of his "deaths," that particular memory ranked among the worst.
"I'd really rather you didn't. The thought of reuniting with you every night in my dreams isn't exactly pleasant."
"Take that up with whoever's in charge of dreams. You think I wouldn't rather dream about having a fun, flirty time with Emilia? Obviously I would."
"The fact that you resign yourself to dreams instead of actual effort — that's about as Subaru as it gets."
"You jerk — don't bounce right back and start calling me a coward! What about you, huh?!"
"Anastasia-sama is a captivating woman. To be able to serve at her side is the greatest honor I could ask for. I consider my position a happy one."
When Julius said that so casually, Subaru let out a cat-like hiss.
He'd forgotten all about the earnest, head-bowing atmosphere — Julius had already returned to his usual self. Subaru grimaced, noting with some irritation that he actually felt relieved by that fact, before clearing his throat and steering the conversation elsewhere.
"About that mustached old man, though... Vice-Commander — that's really true, right?"
"It's natural to be suspicious. But it is fact. That man is none other than
"No one with functioning eyes ever noticed? There's no catch? No one's raising questions?"
"There's a counterpoint to every objection. Of course, there are voices both from above and within the Royal Guard that question the Vice-Commander's qualifications. In fact, his position is more or less a ceremonial title — I doubt anyone has actually seen him perform any real duties."
As Julius shook his head, the image that came to Subaru's mind was that of a government bureaucrat — someone who held a title, did no real work, and collected a hefty salary. That was what "parachute appointments" looked like to Subaru, and Heinkel's position was something close to that.
On top of that, he was known to be incompetent, and still behaved the way he did.
"He's not just riding the coattails of being the Sword Saint's father, is he?"
"...That's not out of the question either. Publicly criticizing the Vice-Commander would inevitably reach the ears of his son, Reinhard. Reinhard's impartiality is well known, but when family is involved — who can say how he would judge? Not everyone is willing to trust him completely on that."
"I can't see Reinhard abandoning his principles over that father of his."
"Be that as it may, he is still his father. No matter how he appears to outsiders, Heinkel is still Reinhard's blood relative. No one can fathom what goes on in his heart."
Subaru's passion was rising, but Julius remained calm, attempting to keep him level.
Subaru gritted his back teeth and let a frustrated groan escape his throat.
Julius was right. No matter how much of a failure of a father Heinkel might be, whether or not that relationship could be severed was something only Reinhard's heart could decide.
As a knight who valued fairness, Reinhard should not be swayed by that family bond. But as a person, Subaru wanted Reinhard to not be so detached that he could sever it easily.
If even outsiders couldn't settle on what to expect of Reinhard, then who were they to tell him not to waver? It would be the height of presumption.
"A moment ago, you said 'that too.' Which means there are other reasons besides that. What else is there...?"
"He is the head of
Julius's response came quickly, delivered with deliberate emotional detachment.
After hearing those words, Subaru thought for a few seconds, then immediately grasped the implication.
"The kingdom — the kingdom doesn't trust Reinhard! Or Wilhelm, either! If Heinkel showed any sign of turning against the kingdom, the entire Sword Saint bloodline could end up as enemies! So they're keeping him close, managing him like a live bomb — is that what this is?!"
If that was the case, what an unforgivable insult it was to Reinhard and Wilhelm.
After seeing those two men for who they truly were, the kingdom still believed they might betray it?
Subaru's fury was every bit as intense as when he had faced Heinkel moments ago. Standing before that blazing Subaru, Julius placed a hand on his shoulder and shook his head.
"Your anger is perfectly justified. But the kingdom must account for every possible scenario."
"What do you mean 'possible'?! That's impossible!"
"...Wilhelm-sama was the former Commander of the Royal Guard."
"—!?"
Subaru, who had been about to brush Julius's hand away, froze at those words.
"Fourteen years ago, a member of the royal family was kidnapped from the castle. At the time, Wilhelm-sama was the Commander of the Royal Guard, and he was also responsible for the search operation to recover the abducted royal."
"So what? I've heard that story before."
The kidnapped royal — the question of whether that was Felt had become a focal point of discussion. Subaru personally took it as something far-fetched, but he couldn't discern Julius's true intention in bringing it up now.
"I know the abducted royal was never found. But what? Are you saying Wilhelm got blamed for it, that's why he left the Royal Guard, and that gives him a reason to resent the kingdom? Because if so, that's..."
"The 'Great Expedition' to slay the
"———"
The words Julius uttered wiped Subaru's thoughts clean.
Into that blank, like something slipping through a crack, flowed the words Wilhelm had once spoken.
Wilhelm had said — that when his wife died, he had not been by her side.
"...Because a royal was kidnapped, he couldn't be there when his wife died. So you're saying Wilhelm bears a grudge against the royal family, against the kingdom — is that what you're saying?"
"I don't know Wilhelm-sama's true feelings. But after the search for the royal was called off and the Great Expedition itself ended in failure, Wilhelm-sama did leave the Royal Guard. That is fact. If not for Commander Marcos, who labored to rebuild the organization afterward, the Royal Guard would have completely ceased to function."
"What do I care about what happened after?! I'm talking about Wilhelm! What do you — what do you think?! That Wilhelm is someone who holds grudges against everyone around him over his wife, that he might... he might—!"
That he harbored resentment toward everything, and might turn against the kingdom.
That he was the kind of man
Had they never seen the Sword Devil's blade, free of any tarnish?
"He's not that kind of person — so why can't anyone understand that!!"
"———"
Subaru finally shook off the arm resting on his shoulder, then thrust Julius's chest away with his palm. Julius stumbled back under the force, and Subaru rose to his feet, glaring down at him.
Julius's amber eyes gazed back at Subaru's fury with something almost like envy.
Subaru knew. He knew full well that his anger was misplaced.
What Julius had told him was simply the reality that such perceptions existed. As for what Julius himself believed — his attitude up to this point made that abundantly clear.
Because a year ago, Julius had honored Wilhelm after the battle against the White Whale.
He had honored Wilhelm, who had finally avenged his wife after fourteen long years.
There was no way the man who had done that could possibly doubt Wilhelm's loyalty to the kingdom.
"...Sorry. I'm an idiot."
"No, you're not wrong. You're right. I'm the one who's in the wrong. —The one who is wrong, but believes himself to be right."
They both lowered their gazes, closing their eyes.
The feeling of powerlessness they shared was the same.
The soil in which suspicion of Wilhelm's heart could take root — that had been cultivated in ways beyond anyone's control. Neither Subaru nor Julius could change anything by simply venting their personal emotions.
"Is it the same for Reinhard?"
"...Following the same logic, one could argue he has a reason to resent the kingdom — for dragging his grandmother into a plan that was doomed to fail, and for the death of the previous Sword Saint."
"Then—"
"But in Reinhard's case, it's different. The kingdom does not suspect him of any betrayal. The one who is suspicious is actually Heinkel himself."
When the name of Reinhard's father came up, Subaru's eyes went round for the third time.
Honestly, it was the last name he wanted to hear — but if Heinkel was involved, there was no covering his ears. If anything, the mere mention of his name lent credibility to whatever unpleasant thing followed.
"What does Reinhard have to do with his father? Well, if we're talking about connection alone, the blood tie couldn't be more explicit."
"There was a period when Reinhard was entirely under Heinkel's thumb. Being father and son, that might seem natural enough — but there were times when it went beyond acceptable limits."
Julius looked away from Subaru, his voice tinged with something that sounded almost like bitterness.
The fact that Julius himself called their relationship "beyond acceptable limits" spoke volumes. What kind of circumstances could have led to that — it was difficult to speculate. But Julius clearly had no intention of going into detail, and quickly returned his gaze: "Starting with Reinhard's push toward independence, those signs naturally faded. However, without knowing the definitive reason for the change, a lingering suspicion remains — that Reinhard might still be susceptible to Heinkel's words."
"...So the kingdom is keeping Heinkel on a pedestal so he won't give Reinhard some terrible order?"
"Or perhaps something worse. This is still in the realm of rumor, but I want you to know — as Reinhard's friend, and as someone who stood up for him back there."
Prefacing his words with a note of caution, Julius briefly surveyed their surroundings. After confirming no one was eavesdropping, he moved to stand right beside Subaru.
And then: "The Vice-Commander is suspected of involvement in the royal kidnapping from fourteen years ago."
"—!?"
"There is no conclusive proof. But it is a fact that he has been investigated and questioned about it on multiple occasions."
"Is that really true? Him, involved in the kidnapping?"
"The truth of the matter is, at this point, irrelevant. The problem is that someone who carries such suspicions — someone who might be able to mobilize the kingdom's greatest fighting force — holds such a position."
The dazzling glory that the name "Sword Saint" carried.
But as the truth behind it continued to emerge, to Subaru it felt less like glory and more like a curse.
"But if Heinkel really was involved in the kidnapping, doesn't that make him the reason his own mother and father never saw each other again before they died?"
"...It goes beyond even that. It's said that Heinkel was the one who recommended Teresia-sama — who had already put down her sword and retired from active duty — to participate in the Great Expedition."
"He sent his own mother to the front lines against the Witchbeasts!?"
"That, we have almost certainly confirmed as fact. In exchange for declining to participate in the Great Expedition himself, he recommended his mother as a substitute."
Subaru was rendered speechless.
This was no longer the same vague basis as before — Julius had stated he had confirmation. If it was recorded, then unless every person involved at the time had been deceived, it was fact.
Heinkel had sent his own mother into battle against the Witchbeasts in his place.
And his mother had died in that battle. His father, unable to be there at her death, had taken up the blade of vengeance. And Heinkel himself had used his son's talent as a shield, living out his days in peace.
It was impossible. No human being could do such a thing.
"Some kind of... mistake, right...?"
He didn't want to believe it.
It wasn't that Subaru believed in Heinkel's humanity. One brief conversation was enough for anyone to see that the man was the worst.
But he didn't want to acknowledge that the man was worse than the worst — base, depraved, repulsive beyond all measure.
He wanted to believe that there was a limit to how far any human being's moral compass could break. He wanted to believe that, and he prayed for it.
The mere act of imagining such a thing happening in reality felt like a sin.
"...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have laid all this on you without giving you any time to prepare."
Julius murmured in a somber voice to Subaru, who was struck dumb.
If the listener was that affected, then the speaker couldn't have been calm either. For Julius, who always demanded rationality from himself, this was unusual behavior — to say the least.
"I-I was the one who asked. It's not your fault. ...If I could say it was your fault, I'd feel a little better."
"That was not admirable of me. Speaking as if I had witnessed it firsthand, mixing gossip with prejudice when discussing another household — that was exceedingly insensitive. As a knight, it was something I should be ashamed of."
"But you did witness it, didn't you? You were Reinhard's friend."
Facing Julius's self-reproach, Subaru said that.
Julius raised his head and looked back at Subaru. Subaru nodded at him, then continued: "I don't know when you and Reinhard became friends, but I can tell you care about him. And I get why you lost your temper. I don't think that's strange or misplaced. Just because it's another family's business doesn't mean you should stand there quietly and mind your own."
"...Is that what you'd say?"
"If you could hear crying from the house next door, you'd go running in, wouldn't you? If you could see your friend through the window, looking down, you'd go call out to them. I don't think it's strange that you were worried about Reinhard. And I don't want to start thinking it is."
If it had been idle curiosity or a prying nature, Subaru would have despised Julius for it.
But in Julius's words, in his actions, and in all the time they'd spent together, Subaru had never seen anything so base.
"Like I said — you don't have to keep clinging to that prim and proper idea of knighthood. That's right. Take off the armor and try being 'Yuri' for a change. Sometimes being a little more flexible works out better."
Yuri was the alias Julius had used when joining the force to subdue the
Unable to join as Julius himself due to his position, he'd hidden his struggle behind that half-elegant pseudonym. In the end, no one called him that anymore — not even Julius himself. But at that time, Julius had not been very knight-like.
"'Yuri,' huh. You've dug up a name I haven't heard in a while."
"It was only good for a moment — barely even that. I almost want to commend myself for remembering it on the spot."
"Don't be bound by the idea of being knightly — that's what you're telling me. You do realize what people call me, don't you?"
"That's exactly why you're so rigid — body and mind. When you're in the bath, take off the armor. And stretch before you put it on again."
Subaru dropped into a split on the spot, pressing his palms flat against the ground to demonstrate his flexibility. Before learning parkour, his body had been stiff as a board, and flexibility was the first thing he'd worked to fix.
And there, in front of Subaru's display of flexibility— "If you think you've won with that, I can only lament the depth of your ignorance."
"Oh!?"
So saying, Julius smoothly slid his legs apart into a flawless split. Long legs extended fully, hips resting comfortably on the ground — his flexibility was nothing short of astonishing.
Was he just determined to outdo Subaru at absolutely everything?
"Nngh... but, but! If it's playing the lyril or sewing lace trim, my victory is unshakeable...!"
"I can't say I see much merit in winning at those, but I do have some proficiency with instruments — as a casual hobby. Sewing is beyond me, though."
"Gah! There it is — 'casual hobby'! When someone like you says 'casual,' you mean world-class! I'm never starting a band with you — you'd steal the lead vocals!"
Julius reversed the motion that had put him into the split, rising smoothly to his feet.
As Subaru continued to grumble, Julius swept a hand through his bangs, then tilted his head back toward the sky with a faint, self-satisfied smile.
"So this is what the sky looked like through Yuri's eyes. This is what the wind felt like."
"Huh?"
"Thinking back, I remember the sky seeming to have a different color than usual back then too. That's all."
"Meaningless. Stop being so pretentious."
Subaru shoved Julius's shoulder, disrupting the contemplative atmosphere, and plopped back down onto the veranda. Julius smiled wryly at that, squinting as if the sunlight were too bright.
By steering the conversation toward something other than what they'd been discussing, they had managed to chase away the awkwardness — at least on the surface.
Of course, the things they had talked about had not vanished from memory, and the knot in his chest had not loosened. But even so, they could at least try not to let that be all they carried.
——From a distance, the two of them looked like nothing more than ordinary friends.