Subaru was so stunned by what had just happened that he could barely register the pain of being hit.
Otto stood over him, glaring down at the boy lying crumpled on the ground. Gone was the usual wishy-washy expression, the ingratiating smile, the face that never showed any strong emotion—instead, his eyes blazed with genuine fury.
"You don't know what to do, and your head's all twisted up into a mess, isn't it?"
"……"
"There are people you need to reach out to, but your arms, your head, your strength—it's all not enough, and you're frantically fighting against time as it slips away, aren't you?"
He hurled the words at the silent Subaru while steadily closing the distance.
Still flat on the ground, unable to move, Subaru grimaced at the throbbing heat that was finally asserting itself in his left cheek. All he could do was watch Otto approach.
"Going silent means 'no denial,' you know. At least in our world, that's the kind of weakness people exploit. —Are you even listening?"
Otto reached out to the wordless Subaru, grabbed him by the collar, and hauled him upright— "If you're listening, then say something!"
"——!"
Something hard and sharp struck his forehead, and Subaru's vision exploded with sparks.
Dazed, Subaru realized that Otto had headbutted him. And while Subaru reeled, Otto delivered another headbutt square to the chest, knocking him backward.
The pain in his forehead, the pain in his cheek, stumbling back with heavy steps—Subaru had endured enough to stay silent.
"What the hell are you—"
"Oh my, for someone who's been on the receiving end this whole time, you were at least conscious? I figured you were out cold, so I did something I'm not used to—roughed you up a bit."
"What did you—!?"
The second headbutt to the nose brought tears to Subaru's eyes, and he lunged at Otto in blind rage. But his outstretched arm slipped past as Otto sidestepped cleanly, and Subaru's legs were swept out from under him. He hit the ground hard.
"Guh!?"
"Thought the blood finally rushed to your head, but now it's your feet you've forgotten about. Truly a quintessentially Natsuki display—pathetic."
"Oh… shut… up!"
From the ground, Subaru sprang up and hurled a fistful of dirt at Otto's face. But Otto had anticipated that too, shielding with his arm. Subaru's surprise at the blocked eye-gouge cost him a split second, and Otto closed the gap. He seized the back of Subaru's collar, planted a hand against his own stomach, and threw him over his hip.
Subaru slammed into the ground on his back, bouncing once before the impact and pain drove the air from his lungs.
He'd landed on a patch of fallen leaves, but that hardly absorbed all the shock. A tingling numbness spread to the tips of his fingers and toes, and he couldn't even stand.
"That little trick with the dirt—that was pretty Natsuki of you, I'll admit. I was prepared for it though, so it didn't work."
"…Ugh…"
"You see, Natsuki? That's all your strength amounts to. You're nowhere close to the knights, to Roswaal, let alone Garfiel. Even against me, this is the result."
Otto shook his head in exasperation, and his words pierced through Subaru's chest as he gasped for air, his lungs still spasming.
Otto walked over to the gasping Subaru, unable to offer a single rebuttal, crouched down, and brought his face close.
"You'd take on the
"……"
"So you'd compensate for your lack of strength with your wits? From what I've seen, your head works well enough in a pinch… but as far as average intelligence or judgment goes, you're really not that impressive. You're practically devoid of common sense."
Subaru didn't understand what Otto was trying to say, and irritation mixed with his ragged breathing.
The spasms in his lungs, the shock of being thrown, the pain in his forehead and cheek—all were gradually fading. In their place, his composure was slowly returning, but with it came confusion about the true meaning behind Otto's words.
Looking down at Subaru with incomprehension darkening his black eyes, Otto continued.
"You lack both strength and wit, and if you think maybe you've got something else that makes up for it… you really don't. You're small, short-armed, and utterly ordinary, Natsuki. And yet for someone like that, you set your sights far too high."
"Wh-what are you… since a while ago…"
"You know you can't reach it, you know you're not enough, and so you figure you'll settle for second best—but instead, you push yourself harder and harder, carving away at yourself to drag out something that doesn't even exist… I think I finally understand how
"Patrasche…?"
Hearing the name of his ground dragon, Subaru's eyes went wide.
Patrasche—the jet-black ground dragon who was far too noble a companion for the likes of Subaru. The dragon who had rushed to save his master from one hopeless situation after another, only for Subaru to shake his head in bewilderment, not understanding why. Patrasche had been his benefactor—his benefactor dragon—who had taught him something precious.
And now Otto said he understood how Patrasche felt.
Subaru blinked. Otto stuck a finger into his own gray hair, and with a voice laced with irritation— "There's nothing wrong with trying to look cool in front of the girl you like. I think that's a necessary kind of pride, and I respect it. Wanting to say or do things beyond your station—that's only natural. I'll overlook that much."
He was talking about
"And trying to look like a worthy man for a girl who loves you—that's fine too. That's important as well. When it comes to love, the one who's loved bears responsibility too, and I think trying to look good for the person who cares about you is something worth doing. I'll allow that."
He was talking about
"But there's a limit to that."
With that declaration, Otto thrust his face forward.
Subaru flinched, thinking he was about to be headbutted again. Otto glared at him as if he wanted to bite.
"You know you're not enough. You know you can't reach it. You want to look cool for the girl you love. You want to be someone the girl who loves you can be proud of."
"……"
"Then why don't you borrow someone's help to cover the parts that are invisible to those girls? —For instance, a friend."
Otto pulled back and pressed his palm to his own chest as he delivered those final words.
At that, Subaru let out a small breath.
Honestly, what he thought in that moment was nothing more than a flat, almost anticlimactic: "Is that all?"
He hadn't exactly never considered clinging to someone, or relying on someone. Of course he had. As Otto said, Subaru knew he was weak and insufficient. He'd never been so arrogant as to think he could do everything alone—nor did he hold himself in such high regard.
In fact, hadn't Subaru scrambled to ask
The result was that he'd gotten no help from either of them. Worse, he'd been forced to learn truths he'd never wanted to know, leaving him more wounded than before.
Even so, it wasn't as though he'd failed to act on Otto's proposed solution. Otto's logic was off the mark. That path was already closed to him.
"…Hah."
"What's so funny?"
Once the dry conclusion took root in his chest, it showed on his face. Seeing that expression, Otto furrowed his brows in displeasure. Subaru, his face red and swelling, stared back at him.
"Your logic is flawed and you're misunderstanding things. …It's not like I haven't tried relying on anyone. I thought I was doing everything I could—I took every action I could think of. I tried to rely on the people I believed would help me, and then…"
He'd been betrayed by their expectations, but couldn't bring himself to give up, so he'd just buried his head in his hands.
And to top it all off, Emilia—the Emilia who'd been thinking "I have to protect him, I have to save him"—had denied him that role, making him realize he'd been looking down on her, thinking of her as a "weak existence" he needed to "shield."
After all those experiences, after meeting all those people, after saying all those bold things, after roaring about saving everyone, after denying the resolve to die and choosing instead the resolve to live, after putting on the facade of someone making at least some progress—Subaru hadn't moved a single step forward or backward.
He couldn't find a single way to change this dead-end situation.
Even his dry smile had run out, and a cold, hard expression settled over his face.
Watching Subaru's quiet anguish, Otto's lips trembled.
"…But I don't recall you ever relying on me, Natsuki."
"……"
"Did you decide I wasn't worth relying on? That it was pointless? Or am I… in your eyes, someone you think you need to protect, just like the rest of them?"
His trembling voice wasn't from suppressed emotion—it was emotion surging because he'd tried to suppress it.
It was Otto's anger, his sadness, the barest fragment of his own helpless rage.
Caught in the aftershock of those emotions, Subaru realized that he'd unintentionally hurt Otto with his silence, and instinctively shook his head.
"That's not it."
"What do you mean, that's not it? If that weren't the case, none of this would make sense. If that weren't the case, why would you stop talking and sit here alone?"
"The reason I haven't… told you anything isn't because I don't trust you. It's not that. It's different."
"……"
As Subaru shook his head and let his gaze wander, Otto said nothing.
He simply stared at Subaru with those green eyes, unwavering.
Under the weight of that gaze, Subaru averted his eyes and pressed his hand to his forehead.
It wasn't that he didn't trust Otto. Within the loops, Otto had risked his life to protect Subaru, and he'd been a good-natured fool who'd stuck around despite receiving no material reward for it. Subaru was genuinely grateful for that. He considered Otto a friend, and those feelings were real.
But how was he supposed to tell Otto the truth and have it believed?
If it were someone like Echidna or Roswaal—someone who already knew the nature of Subaru's circumstances—he could have avoided touching on the taboo conditions and still held a meaningful conversation.
But Otto was different. Not just Otto—Emilia,
Without revealing the
In a situation like that, how could he expect anyone to believe him? How could he harbor such hopes?
He knew he lacked strength. He knew he lacked intelligence. He knew he was weak.
So ultimately, Subaru understood that he would need someone else's power to achieve his wish. He believed that his role was to pave the way for securing that essential cooperation.
The problem was that he couldn't fulfill that role, and he'd come to a complete standstill.
"I can't explain anything properly. My head's all messed up… like you said, everything's jumbled and nothing makes… I can't give you a clear, logical explanation."
"…………"
"It's all stuff you wouldn't believe no matter what I said… I don't even know how to explain it… so I haven't told you anything, haven't told anyone anything…"
"…Go ahead and tell me."
"Huh?"
To Subaru, who was mumbling about having no proof, no basis for anyone to believe him, Otto spoke.
Subaru looked up involuntarily. Otto folded his arms and looked down at him.
"Go ahead and tell me. Even if it doesn't make sense, even if the middle is a tangled mess, even if your head is so scrambled you can't speak in any logical order—I won't cut you off. I'll listen to every last word."
"But, that won't…"
"Then—stop putting on a front! That's what I'm telling you!"
Otto stamped the ground and shouted, his patience finally snapping.
Eyes wide at the sudden outburst, Subaru stared as Otto jabbed a finger at him.
"While you're sitting there agonizing over how you've got no proof you'll be believed, no basis for being trusted, no way to speak logically—all that nonsense—wouldn't it be more constructive to just vomit everything in your head out than to sit there sulking?!"
"But I…! To make you believe… this jumble of—!"
"Tell me everything! Every last bit of it! And when you're done, just say 'Believe me!' That's all you have to do! We're friends, aren't we?!"
—It felt as though every tangled emotion that had been stuffed inside his head had been blasted clean away by Otto's shouted words.
The argument was utterly lacking in logic. Not a shred of persuasiveness to it by any rational measure.
And yet, there was something in it more than sufficient to push Subaru's back, which had been frozen in place, unable to move.
"I don't know if you'll believe me…"
One word at a time, Subaru began to speak. It didn't take long to set loose what he'd been carrying alone.
※※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ "On top of that, Roswaal sent assassins to attack the mansion… and he's trying to drive me and Emilia into a corner with no escape…"
Terrified of triggering the curse on his arm, Subaru explained the situation with painstaking care.
Otto didn't interrupt once. He sat with a furrow between his brows, listening silently to every word.
"As far as I know—and I can't say the information is all that reliable—but that's everything. There's nothing I'm holding back. Nothing."
Of course, the tea party with the Witch and the "Return by Death" parts were separate matters entirely.
Because those parts were missing, the explanations were riddled with gaps. Even Subaru himself felt unsettled by how tenuous the connections between his pieces of information were.
That made him anxious about Otto's reaction. Otto had declared that all he needed to do was add "believe me" at the end—so how had he judged what he'd just heard?
"Natsuki…"
"…………"
After a long silence, Otto unwound his arms and looked at Subaru. Seeing his own reflection in those green eyes, Subaru involuntarily held his breath.
He braced himself, his heart pounding obscenely loud, waiting for that first word.
And Otto spoke to him.
"Wouldn't it be better to pretend you never told me any of this and run away?"
"What—!?!"
The response wasn't just unexpected—it came from an entirely different angle, and Subaru raised his voice. Otto talked right over his surprise, shouting— "You're trapped in a place where the Great Rabbit is going to attack! Your only escape depends on Emilia, who might not even be able to clear the Trial! When you tried to evacuate whoever you could who wouldn't get caught by the barrier, Garfiel got in the way! You finally make it back to the mansion, and it turns out the master of that mansion sent assassins after you! What kind of situation is this?!"
"I'd like to know that too!! Why the hell do I keep getting backed into corners like this?! I knew it, but God really does hate me! I hate him too!"
If a god governing fate existed, that god most certainly hated Subaru. He didn't think he'd done anything to deserve it, but it was an absurd situation all the same.
But resenting God wouldn't move the situation forward or backward, lower the difficulty, or change anything at all. And more to the point— "Wait, Otto. I get that you're worked up, I honestly do… but do you actually believe this insane story?"
"……"
"Terrifying magic beasts are closing in, Emilia's the only one who can do anything about it, Garfiel's blocking everyone's escape, Roswaal's betrayed us with some incomprehensible scheme… You really believe all that?"
Even saying it himself, Subaru could see how the situation seemed to have been curated to be as hopeless as possible.
The biggest problems were the Great Rabbit's approach—which he couldn't prove—and the revelation that Roswaal was the mastermind behind the mansion attack. Those were the fatal issues, and he had zero persuasive evidence for either.
On the Great Rabbit: who in this world would believe that a magic beast everyone coveted was about to descend?
On Roswaal: why would he be orchestrating a scheme that harmed Emilia—the very person he was supposed to support in the Royal Selection?
Neither question could be answered by Subaru.
"Natsuki."
In response to Subaru's question, Otto closed his eyes for a moment, then spoke.
He held up one finger.
"You know, I've traveled to quite a few places, and in my own way, I've interacted with a lot of people."
"…Don't tell me you can tell if someone's trustworthy just by looking into their eyes."
"No, I don't believe in that kind of superstition. When you work in trade, you learn quickly enough just how capable people are of deceiving and betraying others with the most clear-eyed expressions. I've had quite the education in that regard."
He said it with a hint of pride, though Subaru wondered if it didn't simply mean he'd been duped many times.
But it wasn't the time to poke fun during such a serious conversation, so Subaru kept his mouth shut. Otto continued.
"Well, I've met all kinds of people and done my share of business deals. It's been about four years since I left home to become a traveling merchant, and by hook or by crook, I've survived."
Otto spoke in a light tone, but it had probably been anything but an easy road.
There had surely been life-or-death situations more than once.
This was a world where you could run into the White Whale just by crossing a plain—traveling merchants faced all manner of danger. Feral dogs, bandits, and worse.
"Through all that, I've lived my life as a merchant—and I can say with confidence that, up until now, I've always chosen to side with whichever option gave me the best odds. The results haven't always followed, mind you… or rather, the sides I thought had the advantage always ended up suffering unbelievable disasters afterward."
"Hey, hey, hey…"
"Results aside, I've always tried to make decisions I wouldn't regret. When you're staking something of yourself, when you're gambling, I think that's clearly necessary."
Subaru didn't know what Otto's criteria were based on, but the gist was that up to now, he'd always thrown his lot in with whichever side his calculations said had the better chance. That was why he'd accompanied them to the Sanctuary—seeking to maintain his connection to Roswaal, and wanting to keep things on good terms. In that regard, Otto was a thorough pragmatist.
That was exactly why Subaru had been certain that Otto would never lend an ear to words backed by neither proof nor any visible chance of winning— "So this is a first for me, Natsuki."
"Huh?"
Subaru stared at Otto, mouth hanging open, not sure what to expect.
And Otto, with a smile brighter than any he'd shown before, said— "This is the first time I'm throwing my lot in with the side that has absolutely no odds of winning."
He said it without hesitation.
※※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ His legs faltered. His breath came in ragged gasps.
Chasing after his heart, which raced ahead of his body, Subaru tore across the grassy field, dragging frustration behind him.
He sliced through the cool morning air, swinging his arms wide, each stride landing long and sure.
He kicked earth, stepped on stone, and ran in a straight line down the rough path that had been barely leveled.
Before long, his target building came into view through his field of running.
An involuntary elation twisted his bared teeth into something between a grin and a snarl. Panting like a dog, tongue lolling, Subaru threw himself at the entrance and flung the door wide— "—Roswaal!"
He burst inside, practically rolling through the doorway. He crossed the entryway, sprinted through the living area that connected to the bedroom, and threw open the inner door hard enough to nearly break it.
There, sitting upright in bed, was Roswaal. Beside him, fussing over him with diligent care, was Ram. Both of them looked up at Subaru with expressions of genuine surprise.
Roswaal, who was normally so aloof, and Ram, who wore her iron mask of blankness—seeing both caught off guard was rare.
Given that he was about to do something he'd never done before, this was a stroke of good fortune.
He channeled their surprise into something positive, then pointed at the two who were still at a loss for words.
"Let's make a wager. With you and me, and our wishes as chips."