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That's My Dungeon My Life · Chapter 104

Four Guys on a Monster-Hunting Trip (1)

· 11 min read · 2,283 words

The Mazan Mountain Range region.

The Mazan Mountain Range A — a wall of tall mountains sprawling behind Hydrangea.

And the Mazan Mountain Range B — another wall of tall mountains stretching into the neighboring country.

A small territory wedged in the gap between the two Mazan Mountain Ranges, A and B.

That territory was a permanently neutral zone, a brutally harsh environment, and a treasure trove of monsters all at once.

The Mazan Mountain Range region. The Kurutta Plateau.

From the surface, it looked like a gentle plateau where you could admire the mountains in all their beauty, but —

"Hey, watch it! Axe!"

Hoss called out.

Up ahead, a three-eyed rabbit the size of a dog — horns sprouting from its head — was staring at me with bloodshot eyes.

It bared its blade-like double fangs right at me.

If that thing bit you, calling it a fatal wound would be putting it mildly.

"Yeah."

I answered short and raised my sword. The make was standard.

And its appearance was thoroughly standard, too.

A wooden grip — rare these days — with a straight, square wooden crossguard.

The blade was a double-edged straight sword. A typical longsword, and my beloved weapon.

The creature called a Mad Edge — a copper-rank, mid-tier rabbit — leapt.

It raised its lip and double fangs, ready to bite into me.

"Give me a break."

I sighed and slid my blade diagonally upward through the Mad Edge in one smooth cut.

I felt the faintest resistance as the edge bit into the flesh of its lower belly, then cleanly sliced it away.

"Hah. Like I'd want to eat something like this."

A three-eyed rabbit. No thanks.

Behind me, Rel was perched on a protruding rock a short distance away.

She was picking off Mad Edges on the slope below, one arrow at a time. Cool as always.

"Hey. Hoss. Where's Agaro?"

"Agaro, he went charging straight into that herd of big four-eyed cows."

"Those are Hellhorns, aren't they?"

If I remembered right, they were silver-rank, mid-tier monsters — cows with a hardening Relic.

And each one was roughly the size of a small hut.

Charging into a herd of those? Must have a death wish.

Just as I thought that, a massive pillar of fire shot into the sky. I could guess whose handiwork that was.

Hoss watched it and spoke.

"You think Hellhorns are edible?"

"I don't want to eat anything with four eyes."

I said, thoroughly unimpressed.

The monsters around here were all horned and multi-eyed. And hostile, to boot.

Rel came back to join us. She glanced at the pillar of fire and said.

"Truly generous, that. By the way, the tenth sister once ate an entire cow."

"That ain't just big-eating anymore — that's beyond any human level."

"She sucked the bones clean too, apparently."

"The bones too?!"

"I mean, if you boil 'em long enough they do get soft enough to eat, but still, every single bone of a whole cow is insane."

"Come to think of it, did you know there's a saying that if you eat and go straight to sleep, you'll turn into a cow?"

"Oh yeah, come to think of it."

"Eatin' and sleepin' turns you into livestock — we had that one back home too. So what?"

"So the ninth sister is always sleeping, which means she has cow-like chests. That tracks."

"That is completely wrong."

"I'm gonna eat and go straight to sleep."

"Don't compare your own sister's chest to a cow!"

Rel said nothing. She just pushed her glasses up with a faint smirk. Oh boy.

Still, those sisters are quite the entertaining bunch.

And I want absolutely nothing to do with them.

"Heeey. You lot."

"Agaro."

Agaro was heading our way with a massive black-gleaming horn strapped across his back.

A Hellhorn's horn, huh. Wonder what he's planning to do with that thing.

Well, Agaro's got a legendary [Storage Pouch], so I'm sure he's fine.

He's probably putting it in there.

It was our eighth day since entering the Mazan mountain range.

We'd gotten tangled up in all sorts of things—dungeon explorations commissioned by the guild, subjugations related to dungeon anomalies we'd been dragged into.

From those experiences, we realized we had to become even stronger if we wanted to reach our goal.

So I swallowed my pride and asked the witch for help.

And the witch introduced us to Agaro.

At first, Agaro was drunk, and he looked at us like we were a nuisance.

But once we shared drinks and talked passionately, Agaro happily agreed to take us on.

Agaro was strong. Even the three of us together couldn't beat him.

And he never once used a Relic.

As expected of a second-ranked explorer called the "Doom Sword," someone who holds qualifications for the first-class trial.

He's one of the people we're aiming to become as strong as.

Agaro took on a commission for our sake.

It was the subjugation of a great demon rhino lurking in the misty valley of the Mazan mountain range.

The great demon rhino.

A large rhino whose head horn had become a massive blade.

And that blade was an OOPArt. Of course, he'd adapted to it.

A gold-ranked mid-tier monster.

Incidentally, there were also lesser demon rhinos and mid-tier demon rhinos.

Those were silver-ranked low-tier and high-tier monsters, respectively.

A mid-tier demon rhino is one size smaller than a great demon rhino. A lesser one is even smaller than that.

A gold-ranked mid-tier monster, huh... There's no way we could take one on by ourselves.

Right now, we'd be pushed to our limit against a silver-ranked high-tier monster. I think even a gold-ranked low-tier would be tough.

"All right. Let's call it a day here."

Agaro said from directly beneath a massive boulder on the Kurutta Plateau.

The boulder was enormous — you had to crane your neck to see the top. It had been flickering in and out of sight ever since we entered the plateau.

We set up the barrier stones Agaro had prepared on all four sides, pitched the large and small tents, and got a campfire going.

Then we lined up the log chairs and two square white stones Agaro took out.

"Still impressive, that storage pouch of Agaro's."

The pouch on Agaro's hip was a storage-type Relic.

According to him, it could hold about as much as an entire warehouse.

But apparently it was almost entirely filled with alcohol.

"You'll get one too once you hit Third Rank, same as me."

Agaro was already drinking.

Hoss was using one of the white stones as a kitchen counter, cooking away.

He lined the ingredients in a deep-bottomed frying pan, added water, put the lid on, and set it over the campfire.

"Once it boils, take the lid off, right?"

"What are you making?"

"A steamed dish."

"Steamed... hey, that reminds me."

"Another sister story?"

"Which number sister is it this time?"

Rel pushed her glasses up.

"My third sister was worried about her skin getting rough. She heard from the twelfth sister, who's knowledgeable about that sort of thing, that steam is good for the skin. So she promptly lit a campfire and stuck her face right into the smoke, choking herself silly. Apparently she was confusing steam and smoke."

"Just a plain klutz."

"A heartwarming klutz, that one."

"The third sister does trip a lot, true. She trips, she trips, she knocks over buckets and gets soaked, she falls into ponds, she falls into trap pits in the catacombs—"

"What do you mean, catacombs?"

"What's with the trap pits?"

"The thirteenth sister's bedroom. She's been holed up in a perfectly respectable catacombs that's been passed down through our family for generations. Occasionally the sisters go check on her. The third and fifth sisters keep getting caught in the traps along the way."

"Are the traps even safe?"

"Before that—the fact that the catacombs are her bedroom is more concerning, don't you think?"

"The traps are non-lethal and mostly just pit traps. She puts down extra-thick cushions so nobody gets hurt. What a kind little sister."

"That completely defeats the purpose of a trap."

"Kind isn't the word—your sisters are just a little off. Especially the one holed up in catacombs."

Seriously, what kind of sisters are these.

"Gahahahahahaha! What a riot. Rel's sisters."

Agaro burst out laughing. It was certainly funny, but—

Now's my chance. I should ask.

"Hey, Rel. Of all your sisters, who's the scariest? I mean, the most terrifying one?"

Hmm. Let me see. The first sister, definitely.

"Wasn't she the next marquis or something?"

"Yeah, she's the acting lord now."

"So that's why she's the scariest? Strict, harsh, serious personality, right?"

She sounded like the textbook image of a terrifying person. But Rel gave a small shake of her head.

"No. The truly scary one is the first sister after she's had a drink."

"She get mean when she's drunk or something?"

"Not on that level."

"Her personality flips or something like that?"

"Exactly. When the first sister drinks, she――――――becomes the Holy Mother."

"Huh?"

"So, um, is the eldest sister married?"

"No. She's thirty-three and still single."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Wait, she's over thirty?"

"There's no sign of her getting married, either."

"Same as my sister, then. She's thirty."

Agaro muttered that offhandedly. Well, yeah, Arifa's older sister was like that.

"There was one time she turned into the Holy Mother at a dinner party where all the sisters were gathered. After that, the sisters never defied the first sister again. The fourth sister, the seventh sister, and the thirteenth sister all started foaming at the mouth and passed out."

"What do you have to do to make that happen?"

"Is that what makes someone a Holy Mother?"

"That's kinda scary."

Agaro said that offhandedly. It really was scary.

But every time, I found myself wondering what exactly was going on with Rel's family.

There's a line between closeness and politeness, and while I was curious, I didn't ask anything.

I knew it wouldn't lead anywhere good, so that was part of why I kept quiet.

And she could cook. It was a steamed fish dish. Genuinely delicious.

I'd been eating nothing but meat lately, so the fish was a welcome change.

When we finished eating, Hoss cleaned up.

Rel set up a makeshift lookout post a short distance away, took her bow in hand, and stood watch.

Agaro and I sat across the campfire from each other, drinking at a leisurely pace.

It was unusual for Agaro, who always wanted to turn everything into a drinking contest.

"Oh, by the way. Your mom. How's she doing?"

"...She's doing well. Wait, Agaro — do you know her?"

"Yeah, she looked after me when I was just starting out."

"First I'm hearing of this..."

"A lot of delvers were taken care of by Emmy. My older sister was one of them. We're grateful."

"...Um, there's something I've been wondering about. Why is my mom — my mother — still Rank II? She should easily be Rank I by now."

"That, well... I heard about it the last time we met. Apparently it's a self-imposed restriction."

"A self-imposed restriction..."

"—I couldn't face what was important to me and ran away. As penance for that, I've stayed at Rank II this whole time."

"............"

"Well, you can ask her the details yourself. You're her son, after all."

"Yes... When I see her, I definitely will."

"Do that. Well, that gratitude plays a part too, but above all, it's your determination. Aiming for the top without even having a Relic. Isn't that something? It makes me want to cheer you on. Besides... I also felt a little envious."

"Envious?"

What did he mean by that?

Agaro poured sake into a cup and spoke while gazing at it.

"It's not that I hate who I am now or anything like that. It's just that I got to thinking. Just like you can't possess a Relic, I can't lose mine either. That means I can never take on a challenge the way you guys do. I thought about that for a bit, and... yeah, I felt envious."

So that was another way to look at it.

Come to think of it, as far as I knew, he was right—he couldn't lose his Relic.

Which meant he could never be without one. It was something I'd never even considered.

Of course. Nobody in their right mind would want to lose a Relic.

This was getting interesting. If that was the case, then I'd push a little further.

"Agaro. Want me to tell you something that'll make you even more envious?"

"What?"

"Have you heard of a Relic Plate?"

"...You..."

"Someone found one and offered it to me, saying I could use it. But I turned it down."

"What? You turned it down...!? You. Are you serious? Relic Plates are incredibly rare, you know...! Don't you guys want Relics?"

"No, we don't have one. Not having a Relic is what we're proud of right now."

I can say that with confidence. I like who I am right now. I really do.

Then Agaro downed the cup of liquor he'd been swirling and staring at in one gulp.

"Glug... pahaa, you got me. Axe. You were right... I've gotten even more envious of you damn kids...!"

With that, Agaro took another drink and grinned.

I glanced up at the sky. The stars were glittering so brightly it looked like they might rain down any moment.

Old lady. No — Mom.

Me, right now, without a Relic — I like this version of me.

End of chapter 104